tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29989985470008134142024-03-13T10:18:07.175-07:00My Buddha is pinkRichard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.comBlogger220125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-12442729227334566852014-03-29T09:41:00.001-07:002014-09-20T07:18:49.024-07:00Colbert to the left of me, white men to the right<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj6foFSLDQemWts5Jr12OS73utq5IOgyXuImowDdk_quw3P47p2Uyztkl7dKUhF0s_UfWlF7V8NoX6q8v6aiqq56s2IpEvRKVK1PtXSTwQm5N3AUVXkjbYvygFOegP1cLE67AWUT1YpyQ/s1600/225576_497060597007748_473859167_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj6foFSLDQemWts5Jr12OS73utq5IOgyXuImowDdk_quw3P47p2Uyztkl7dKUhF0s_UfWlF7V8NoX6q8v6aiqq56s2IpEvRKVK1PtXSTwQm5N3AUVXkjbYvygFOegP1cLE67AWUT1YpyQ/s1600/225576_497060597007748_473859167_n.jpg" height="214" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">And here I am, stuck in the middle with Assalayana.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Lately, I've been feeling like the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.093.than.html" target="_blank">legendary Assalayana</a>,
a 16-year-old student of the Brahmans who was given the unenviable task to
dispute the Buddha's assertion that all castes are capable of enlightenment. And
not just to dispute that assertion, but argue it head-to-head with the Buddha
himself.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Needless to say, Assalayana didn't like this task. While
he was an excellent student of many subjects, he knew that the Buddha was
unassailable in debate. And it was quite possible that even before his personal
encounter with the Buddha, he agreed with the Buddha's premise: he tells the
Brahamans that the Buddha teaches Dhamma, which, when capitalized, is the Pali
word for truth (lowercase it more closely translates as "dogma" or
"doctrine"). So Assalayana tries to get out of this assignment. The
Brahmans, however, impose their will, telling the erudite teen that if he's
going to go down a loser, do it in battle.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">And indeed, Assalayana goes down. So hard, in fact, that
the youth droops into a deep depression right before the Buddha's eyes. Seeing
this, in his immeasurable compassion, the Buddha shares with Assalayana a final
Dhamma lesson that immediately convinces the youth to devote himself as a lay
follower of the Buddha.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I've been thinking about Assalayana's experience recently
in connection with the divisiveness regarding the #CancelColbert trend and the
incendiary debate it has sparked.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">For background, it began with a Tweet from @ColbertReport,
an account connected with the Colbert show. The Tweet, which reportedly has
been deleted, read: "I'm willing to show the #Asian community I care by
introducing the Ching-Chong Ding-Dong Foundation for Sensitivity to Orientals
or Whatever." That Tweet, in and of itself, was extraordinarily offensive
and struck me, at least, as being very much out of Colbert's character.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Tweet launched the hashtag #CancelColbert, thanks to
@suey_park, which rallied hundreds, if not thousands of non-white people
expressing their outrage.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Tweet came from <a href="http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/b6cwb3/sport-report---professional-soccer-toddler--golf-innovations---washington-redskins-charm-offensive?xrs=synd_twitter_032814_cn_43" target="_blank">this segment on his show</a>, which was
largely devoted to lampooning Daniel Snyder.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">It also ignited a litany of counter-tweets from
predominately white people whose message was essentially, "shut up all of
you, it's satire you stupid .... (insert racist expletive/ad hominem of your choice)."
That activity attracted attention from a multitude of ostensibly
liberally-leaning news and information websites that most of which, in my
opinion, immediately adopted a defensive and reactionary point of view.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Suey Park was invited on to HuffPo Live to talk about the
issue, but was gaslighted by the host who shut her down as soon as it became
apparent to him - a white man - that he wasn't interviewing a subservient,
docile Asian woman (<a href="http://live.huffingtonpost.com/r/segment/obama-tries-to-mend-ties-with-saudi-arabia/532b1c8cfe344439180006de" target="_blank">her segment appears at roughly the 30 min mark</a>). It's worth
pointing out it was Suey Park who behaved absolutely professionally despite the
circumstances.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">What astounded me was I found myself defending that anger
regarding the Tweet, as well as its original context within the segment it was
attached, against liberal white men <a href="http://deadspin.com/gooks-dont-get-redskins-joke-1553907157?utm_campaign=socialflow_deadspin_twitter&utm_source=deadspin_twitter&utm_medium=socialflow" target="_blank">and journalists</a> that I normally would have
thought to be allies in these circumstances; I was not deflecting attacks from
right wing reactionaries (although they came out of the woodwork as well, as
expected). My sense of astonishment soon became dismay as I realized from the
many others I engage with on Twitter that this was not surprising at all, that
white liberals remain blinded to a large degree by their privilege. And that
blindness was glaringly apparent.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Of course, I was ridiculed for failing to grasp satire
and how it works. And yet, presumably liberal-minded white men couldn't hear my
message when I said that white men need to stop presuming they are the arbiter
of what is or is not offensive to non-whites. But as the <a href="http://cheuya.tumblr.com/post/81020452123/why-i-need-cancelcolbert" target="_blank">writer in this post</a> so
prosaically points out, satire is meant to punch up, not down; it's designed to
ridicule power and those that hold it, not the victim of that power. No one,
however, was listening; it was a perfect storm of white men clamoring to
justify another white man's behavior because it was "art."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">"He's playing a character, you dumb shit, don't you
get that?" opined one on Twitter.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I had others "explain" to me the full context of the original episode while they arrogantly presumed I had not seen the full clip, that I was reacting only to the original Tweet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I felt my shoulders metaphorically slump just as
Assalayana's had. The premise that Assalayana was sent to defend against the
Buddha was a very racist notion that the Brahmans were the highest caste, that
no other caste was equal, and the only way to become part of that caste was to
be born in it. The Buddha methodically destroys that delusion, yet all
Assalayana can say is, Yes, I agree with you Goatama, but this is how the Brahmans
believe.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">It is the delusion of privilege, and Assalayana is
feeling the pressure of having been sent to defend that privilege while
simultaneously clearly seeing it is delusion. He feels helpless and
overwhelmed, and right there in front of the Buddha, he slips into despair (It
really is a fantastic sutta to read).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">But the Buddha does give him an out by offering the compassionate
hand of the Dhamma and Assalayana readily accepts the gesture. By doing that, the
teen willingly walks away from the Brahman culture that gave him his education
and taught him many vitally important lessons. Yet that single delusion, so
tenaciously held by even the most erudite of the caste, made being part of that
system of thought unpalatable for the teenaged Assalayana.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I
do wish I had the Buddha's debate skills. For now, I will continue to muddle
through life, shedding a bit more of my privilege every day because in the end,
it is my karma that I carry, no one else's, and I create my karma on my own, no
one else creates it for me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 11pt;"><br /></span>Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-18862308592734486532014-03-20T16:26:00.000-07:002014-03-20T16:26:19.695-07:00Thank you Fred Phelps<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicEttiBkhY1OraVbnlaF-Eyal5LwwjAx1U-qh4vwZ5n5f-RevCEozZP0zNP3ISE72Tt7CGbwhdcdvIV0_zEWbPXqV8jpoJ0QEKbwI_6_-5NzB6q2RTATG_vgioGe_wjc2WoDE0x6jmF8Y/s1600/December+011.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicEttiBkhY1OraVbnlaF-Eyal5LwwjAx1U-qh4vwZ5n5f-RevCEozZP0zNP3ISE72Tt7CGbwhdcdvIV0_zEWbPXqV8jpoJ0QEKbwI_6_-5NzB6q2RTATG_vgioGe_wjc2WoDE0x6jmF8Y/s1600/December+011.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
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Not for dying. Oh no, I don't ever want to be thankful
for someone's death.</div>
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<br /></div>
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But on this day of the infamous reverend from Topeka's
death, I do want to say thanks.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Thanks for exemplifying for so many just how ugly and
consuming hatred is. Thanks for showing people who were either indifferent or
uninterested in gay issues in general that things like marriage equality,
protection of our families, and our spiritual lives had value.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Thank you for nudging people from that state of apathy
into one of support, one in which people could vote in support of marriage
equality and housing rights and job security because you revealed so eloquently
just how vile and mean-spirited it was to oppose them.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Thanks you also for showing people what your beliefs
really looked like when they were no longer confined to the space between one's
ears, or even the space between the walls of their church or congregation.
Because certainly many had heard those words from their spiritual leaders, but
never so publicly, never with such prosaic venom.</div>
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<br /></div>
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You brought true awareness to many that needed it. You
nudged them out of a dangerous delusion. And you exemplified that hell is not a
place, but rather a state of mind, one that consumed yours until the end.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Yes, you made life miserable for many people. You and
yours brought great harm to others, embittered many, and for that you will
experience (or have experienced) the consequences.</div>
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<br /></div>
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But make no mistake, by being that person that you were,
you helped many. I suspect you even brought a few alienated families together,
reintroduced conversation to families that didn't talk.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Some people will only always see you as evil, that
nothing good ever came from you. But I see it differently. Granted, I would
have preferred your help on different terms. But help is accepted regardless.</div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
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And I know that some may attack what I say here. Perhaps
it's because they still feel that bitterness you brought to them. But just like
you discovered, and I think you did, you cannot fling the fire of hate without
first getting burned yourself.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-18194974743739831162014-03-02T07:54:00.000-08:002014-09-20T07:34:14.347-07:00The fine line between nothing matters and everything matters<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCi5QFGo0cVWHC7R8wyJVefgF8qOS8ECHHKTZV4zpRO5ZKnJBK7nXzYou9C06Das1usSGIXSvma_JnCzMl83Frmf6q66Rll48Qx6nir4FiBVWvPAVM1SNiib1uH448T0Z53Yxpq8TDRrY/s1600/197214_3843184524833_637720142_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCi5QFGo0cVWHC7R8wyJVefgF8qOS8ECHHKTZV4zpRO5ZKnJBK7nXzYou9C06Das1usSGIXSvma_JnCzMl83Frmf6q66Rll48Qx6nir4FiBVWvPAVM1SNiib1uH448T0Z53Yxpq8TDRrY/s1600/197214_3843184524833_637720142_n.jpg" height="400" width="267" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
An acquaintance of mine and I used to often chant,
"It just doesn't matter." We would look at the ways of the world and
think to ourselves, "Seriously?"</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Because in the larger scheme of things, nothing really
mattered. We were all going to die some day. Whatever wealth (or debt),
reputation, knowledge, even friendships that we gathered along the way during
this journey of life, the bottom line was we will die and all that will be
lost. Food for worms we would become.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It is a beguiling notion and, unsurprisingly, many
Buddhists succumb to the siren's call of nihilism. In fact, in my
"Buddhism" list on Twitter, I saw this Tweet:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"The problem with dinner banter is most people don't
want to hear your views on how nothing matters."</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It's difficult not to believe at times that the point of
living is dying, or as Jake Shears of Scissor Sister so eloquently sings:
"Happy yesterday to all, we were born to die."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Is that really all there is to it? Because if it is, then
I don't give a shit about the debts I run up, let the poor suckers I leave
behind deal with that. If the banks want to extend me that credit, then fine, I
will use it to the max and not give a shit because in the end, when I'm dead,
they ain't getting nothing.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Or is that all there is? Perhaps we are all born to die,
but is that it?</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Ah, nihilism, come here my pretty.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Buddhism is filled with practices and concepts that are
frequently co-opted by the opportunistic and simplified to such an extreme that
one's delusions become strengthened rather than eradicated. The concept of
"mindfulness" is one in particular, <a href="http://www.patheos.com/blogs/americanbuddhist/2014/02/mindful-of-your-immorality.html" target="_blank">as exemplified here</a> (please be
aware that I cite Justin's post not because I have any "skin in the
game" regarding the Google busses, etc., but because it's an excellent
example of how mindfulness gets dumbed-down into an elite practice of showy
privilege).</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Perhaps the most misinterpreted teaching of the Buddha's
is that to the Kalamas, which is often distorted into a justification for doing
whatever you can rationalize as being OK. As the venerable <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/bodhi/bps-essay_09.html" target="_blank">Bhikkhu Bodhi wrote</a>:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"On the basis of a single passage, quoted out of
context, the Buddha has been made out to be a pragmatic empiricist who
dismisses all doctrine and faith, and whose Dhamma is simply a freethinker's
kit to truth which invites each one to accept and reject whatever he likes."</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
This is nothing new. During the Buddha's lifetime there
were others who confused the Dhamma for a doctrine of nihilism. <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an10/an10.094.than.html" target="_blank">In the Vajjiya Sutta</a>, a group of wandering mendicants make such an assertion:</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"Now wait a minute, householder. This contemplative
Gotama whom you praise is a nihilist, one who doesn't declare anything."</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Interestingly, it's the lay follower Vajjiya Mahita who
corrects these wandering mystics:</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"I tell you, venerable sirs, that the Blessed One
righteously declares that 'This is skillful.' He declares that 'This is
unskillful.' Declaring that 'This is skillful' and 'This is unskillful,' he is
one who has declared [a teaching]. He is not a nihilist, one who doesn't
declare anything."</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
By declaring there are skillful ways to do things and
unskillful ways to do things, the Buddha is quite clearly stating that yes,
things do matter. Our actions matter. They matter because the intentions we
form prior to our actions matter. The <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/bodhi/waytoend.html" target="_blank">Noble Eightfold Path</a> is all about the
right ways to do things, presented with the understanding that there are wrong
ways to do things. Or, the better way to explain it, there are skillful means
and unskillful means. There are desired outcomes and outcomes to be avoided.
The more we choose <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2010/12/finding-right-action.html" target="_blank">skillful actions</a>, the more we experience desirable outcomes.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And none of this requires a belief in an afterlife. Being
aware of that, the Buddha skillfully taught how we can "<a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.060.than.html" target="_blank">hedge our bets</a>." By acting in accordance with the Dhamma, we're covered whether
there is or is not an afterlife, whether there is rebirth or no rebirth. And
clearly, we can experience the fruits of skillful living during our life now,
as revealed in the opening verses of the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.01.than.html" target="_blank">Dhammapada</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The nihilist can speak with such aplomb about the fact
that we all die and there's nothing that comes next. Yet, we do everything we
can to extend whatever time we do have, to extend every moment of happiness we
experience, and to avoid every unpleasant situation. This all becomes less
frenetic once we become aware of the fact that we are where we are because of
what we did in the past, and if we want to enjoy a happy future, then we need
to <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.131.than.html" target="_blank">pay attention to what we are doing right now</a> in this moment.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Because it matters.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-81414752995553907472014-02-28T11:13:00.000-08:002014-02-28T11:13:31.329-08:00Happy Buddhists really annoy me<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_nklRku9eLSRUuBlIaWQ8T4x3TbSNSQGYN8D5TgDxuxfiIxRKX-kKpVLLUBK_FZGFbZkiOtjvR6or5fZMIilA8xpNpRCKyQulOe2ZJekF28F6MVk_s5OPkSlO-8JEGu2dkiVgnw1c0XY/s1600/522648_10150987901342656_1951107265_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_nklRku9eLSRUuBlIaWQ8T4x3TbSNSQGYN8D5TgDxuxfiIxRKX-kKpVLLUBK_FZGFbZkiOtjvR6or5fZMIilA8xpNpRCKyQulOe2ZJekF28F6MVk_s5OPkSlO-8JEGu2dkiVgnw1c0XY/s1600/522648_10150987901342656_1951107265_n.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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No, really. They bug the shit out of me.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
"What crawled up your culottes?"</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Buddhist sophistry.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Seriously, Buddhists who talk-tweet-blog-chirp non-stop
about how happy they have become are really just projecting how miserable they
are. But rather than deal with their unhappiness in an honest and direct way,
they figure if they just keep telling others they are happy that maybe they'll
be able to conjure up Manjushri's sword to cleave their miserable heart,
revealing the pulsing bliss of Kwan Yin.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
"<a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.19.than.html#dhp-259" target="_blank"><i>Simply talking a lot doesn't maintain the Dhamma</i></a>."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
There's not a lot to be happy about. I'm a 55-year-old gay man surrounded by men who think they are 10s (some of them seriously are)
and they're all looking for an 11. They go to the gym to get these bodies that
they've become enslaved to, because as soon as they stop working out, their
body goes to hell.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Well, I shouldn't cast stones. I go to the gym. Not as
often as I should, but I go. I want to stay ahead of this bulge I
have. Seriously, I can't even see my penis anymore. Well, I can see it when I
have an erection, or when I tilt my head down, or when I'm lying on my back and
my belly flattens out because gravity pulls all the fat down toward the mattress.
And I kid myself that, yeah, I'm going to return to that svelt 180-pound
gorgeous man I was in my 30s, I just need to shed, you know, like 30 pounds.
And I need to watch my health. After all, I've had <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2012/03/new-meaning-of-mindfulness.html" target="_blank">a stroke</a> and a <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2013/03/dont-get-lost-in-details.html" target="_blank">heart attack</a>,
so I should take care of myself.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Wait. I was going to the gym before I had a stroke and a
heart attack, and I still had a stroke and a heart attack. So there you go. A
lot of good it's done me.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But I digress.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>All too soon, this body<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>will lie on the ground<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> cast
off,<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>bereft of consciousness,<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>like a useless scrap<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> of
wood.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Now <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.03.than.html#dhp-41" target="_blank">there's a happy thought</a>, eh?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Don't get me wrong. There are plenty of happy Buddhists
and I admire them, I want to be like them, and I pay attention to what they say
and do. And you know what? The really, truly happy Buddhists never talk about
how happy they are. They don't have to because you can see it for yourself.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Happiness is just like any other feeling, it comes and
goes. Anyone who says they are happy are lying. Because to be aware of your
happiness means to kill your happiness. Consider the basics of meditation: when
thoughts or feelings arise, you pay attention to them and observe them rather
than indulge them, and when you observe them, they go away, the mind settles.
So as soon as you acknowledge your happiness, you just killed the buzz.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Real happiness, the "Buddhisty" type of
happiness is a happiness you never think about. It's just there, like <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.01.than.html" target="_blank">the shadow that never leaves</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Give me a miserable Buddhist over a self-professed happy
one any time. He or she will be the better teacher and companion than the halcyon
Buddhist with his or her deluded saccharine silliness.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-64574200525090957562014-02-16T11:20:00.000-08:002014-02-26T15:45:56.029-08:00Why I don't own a gun<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh69Tk3cmGRZQGeZ2QMAUg7UlLBZ7VouKn-_kAkPxBJQEr9Kw1SdvL5JK2GPyZElh8AaGd09U8IoCXN0H5y_cly9gvkMXHtLBa-4eUNb-Ivgx4bLu0Wg0RlFY3dpfmWebbIGV6-ZRR_so8/s1600/Dawn+DVNP+9.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh69Tk3cmGRZQGeZ2QMAUg7UlLBZ7VouKn-_kAkPxBJQEr9Kw1SdvL5JK2GPyZElh8AaGd09U8IoCXN0H5y_cly9gvkMXHtLBa-4eUNb-Ivgx4bLu0Wg0RlFY3dpfmWebbIGV6-ZRR_so8/s1600/Dawn+DVNP+9.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
The last time I fired a weapon was almost 40 years ago.
My decision to not ever fire a weapon again since has been resolute. A <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2010/07/i-am-hunter.html" target="_blank">blog post I wrote</a> nearly four years ago explains why. But there's a more fundamental
reason for me to not own a gun.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Owning a gun means I have formulated the intention to
kill. I may never kill anyone or anything while owning a gun, but the intention
would be there, for why else would anyone own a gun?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
First, let me clarify something. I do not begrudge people
who hunt, nor do I view them with any form of disdain, and nor will I attempt
to take their opportunities to hunt away from them. Having said that, hunting
involves killing, regardless of the purpose, or, more precisely, the intent.
The Buddha teaches that nothing occurs without consequence - "<a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an10/an10.092.than.html" target="_blank">when this is, that is ... when this isn't, that isn't</a>" - and that all
actions are preceded by an intention. This is the core of his teaching on
kamma.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But while kamma has everything to do with cause and
effect, it is not linear; rather, it's more like loops of feedback that occur
in our lives because we always have the opportunity to eliminate our kamma with
the creation of every new intention and subsequent action. The Buddha's
teaching about <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an03/an03.099.than.html" target="_blank">The Salt Crystal</a> is pertinent here. As the Buddha teaches, if you put a
teaspoon of salt into a glass of water, the water will taste salty; but if you
put a teaspoon of salt into the Ganges, the water will not taste salty. So a
single act within the greater context of your lifetime - or multiple lifetimes
- holds negligible consequence because of all the other actions you can
take to "dilute" the salt's presence.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
That's important to remember, that we can
"dilute" our actions, but we can never eliminate what has already
happened; the salt does not disappear, it just cannot be tasted.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Hunting, to me, is like the teaspoon of salt in a river,
but even that depends on the reasons behind why a person hunts. A person who
hunts to provide food for his or her family creates kamma different from the
person who hunts for sport.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Killing another person? That's a tablespoon of salt in a
glass of water. Even with saying that, however, all homicides are not equal and
the kamma created will be as varied as the intention behind the act. The point
is, no one is immune from the consequences of killing, regardless of intent.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Which is why I will not own a firearm. Particularly a
handgun. There is no other purpose for a handgun other than to kill another
human. Even if self-defense, owning a handgun is done with full knowledge that
it may be used to kill another person. Anyone who thinks otherwise is deluding
him or herself.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And this is why I believe that Michael Dunn is guilty of
murder, plain and simple. I have seen some comments on Twitter following the
jury's verdict wondering how difficult it will become in the future to prove
intent behind premeditated murder when it comes to self-defense. For me it's
quite simple. Michael Dunn had formed the intention to kill someone long ago,
and I suspect his intention was to specifically kill a black youth. All Dunn
was waiting for was the right opportunity.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
That is why I will not own a firearm of any kind.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>A person unknowing:</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>the actions performed by him,</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>born of greed, born of aversion,</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>& born of delusion,</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>whether many or few,</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>are experienced right here:</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> no
other ground is found.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>So a monk, knowing,</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> sheds</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>greed, aversion, & delusion;</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>giving rise to clear knowledge, he</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> sheds</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>all bad destinations.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an03/an03.033.than.html" target="_blank">Nidana Sutta</a></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-20577314161114413552014-02-13T15:37:00.000-08:002014-02-13T15:37:20.770-08:00We're here, we're queer, we're here to help you<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgemgJ4X6HVhtUMiFIVoTvp73i47KwrDCoQQQRdMryuVvKf77we4UhX-g-yLvJsBHwvONBTaXs1hAt7gWVl8cAoUdljRSB97eFf-xKgownVNiY_BNzv-w3ohcD1DDSiQ0CKmHMobWD8ztU/s1600/iPhone+July+058.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgemgJ4X6HVhtUMiFIVoTvp73i47KwrDCoQQQRdMryuVvKf77we4UhX-g-yLvJsBHwvONBTaXs1hAt7gWVl8cAoUdljRSB97eFf-xKgownVNiY_BNzv-w3ohcD1DDSiQ0CKmHMobWD8ztU/s1600/iPhone+July+058.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Duality in Buddhism is a common concept, one you can find
references to regardless of vehicle. It's also one of those Buddhist concepts
that gets misused, is misunderstood, and which can easily lead the unskilled
into dangerous complacency.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I mean, seriously, I'm sorry that my eyes roll whenever I
hear someone pontificate that, "Like, there's no wrong or right, you know?
Those are just false concepts that are forced by a society that wants to, like,
control you. You know?"</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Gnarly, dude.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
On the one hand, the idea that duality is a false concept
in most of our experience is right on. Jim Wilson in his essay for the second
volume of Queer Dharma provides a really nice explanation of duality and how
it's a fabrication tenuously held together by a collective acceptance that it
exists. Wilson, in his essay "Practicing Buddhism As A Gay Man," uses
the former "border" between East and West Germany to illustrate his
point. For year's, the world accepted the duality there was an East Germany and
a West Germany. Then one day, there was one Germany. Where did the line go? Was
it even there except in our minds? For one period of time, the world agreed
there were two Germanies, then one day, the world agreed there was one Germany.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Just like that.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Something a little more difficult for many to grasp is
the notion of race and precisely how fluid it really is. In her excellent
recent article in Salon, "<a href="http://www.salon.com/2014/02/07/the_history_white_people_need_to_learn/" target="_blank">The History White People Need to Learn</a>,"
Mary-Alice Daniel reveals that even the idea of "white people" hasn't
always been clearly defined as a separate race. In fact, it wasn't until people
with white skin started to encounter with greater frequency people with skin
other than white did "whites" perceive a need to collectively
identify themselves as "white." Prior to that, races were divided
according to nationalities (another fabrication, I know): For example, the
Germans were a race different from the Italians, who were different from the
Celts, etc.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So, yes, race is a construct, a creation of mind. Having
said that, there is a problem with being too ready to accept that as the way
things are. Saying this is the way things are is not the same as seeing things
as the way things are, and, frankly, I am skeptical when I hear Buddhists, in
particular white Buddhists, say that. It makes one lazy, providing an excuse to
be unmotivated to tackle the real issues surrounding such "theoretical
constructs" like race, gender, and sexuality in our sanghas.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Wilson's essay is exceptional for another reason beyond
the way he describes the concept of dualism, and that is the role lesbigay
practitioners play in disrupting the dualism surrounding gender identity.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"Because gay men, and other sexual minorities, do
not fall within the categories of how the mind has structured male and female,
the presence of gay men, simply by that presence, calls into question the
dualistic consciousness upon which that division rests. I believe this goes a
long way towards explaining why the presence of gay men provokes strong
hostility from many people."</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Just by showing up we completely disrupt long-held
notions of not just sexuality, but gender roles - we turn them on their head!
And just when some people think they've figured out the idea of gay and
straight, we turn things upside down again with transgendered people, asexual
people, and whatever amorphous method of gender and sexual orientation we can
come up with. It freaks people out because some folks obsess themselves with
why there's an apparent obsession over gender identification. The amazing thing
is that this is nothing new, there's always been those who do not conform to
the duality of male and female and the roles thereby assigned. Only now are
people willing to say something about it and demand acceptance of their
existence.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And even though race has always been somewhat fluid, it's
become even more fluid as people are no longer accepting limited
categorizations based on skin color. No, we are Hispanic black or Asian brown
or Latino mulatto or whatever. On one hand there are those who say, "stop
all this nonsense! These are all just theoretical constructs!" But on the
other hand, forcing the recognition of these differences pushes people out of
their comfort zones, which had successfully insulated them from engaging other
human beings as they are without first compartmentalizing them into easily
recognized boxes of existence.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It can seem like alphabet soup out there when we talk
about race, ethnicity, gender identity, or sexuality. And it's understandable
that it can be frustrating. But so what? It becomes a problem only under two
circumstances.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
One is when others push back against this process of
self-identification. The reason for pushing back is defensive and selfish
because these "new" labels disrupt and challenge previously held
sacred beliefs about who and what people are. Such self-identification also
challenges the power structure that remains largely under the control of
straight white males, both in and out of the various Buddhist communities.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The other is when people present a facade that they are
beyond prejudice and privilege by retreating to the position that these are all
fabrications that we just need to relinquish. Because such a position is not
letting go; the fabrication is, in fact, retained and strengthened into an even
more-secure delusion.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">And besides, our Buddhist precepts demand that we do
this. The Fourth Precept encourages us to refrain from lying. Ignoring our
personal identities would be a violation of the precept. As everyone one of us
now out of the closet knows, denying our sexual identity is to relegate
ourselves to a personal hell. Coming out is freedom, it's liberation, and
Buddhism is all about liberation.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So
yeah, we're here, we're queer, and we're here to help you.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span>Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-26977794781854955072014-02-08T09:03:00.000-08:002014-02-08T09:55:08.758-08:00Tumbling over privilege<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBPrYkJKoTM1i1m7qTMfALuhdsS0Y8g_HRQBpauPJUqz1d7AQrlj6hKMGKsO5yM3tdtpqRk3KGU57Cw-ZwDGQmlizvqoV8kNCGw0MCdnHFsh4sCieZ1-cXRDUvlTfrw6Rx_byQ76SaKP8/s1600/New+Orleans+018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBPrYkJKoTM1i1m7qTMfALuhdsS0Y8g_HRQBpauPJUqz1d7AQrlj6hKMGKsO5yM3tdtpqRk3KGU57Cw-ZwDGQmlizvqoV8kNCGw0MCdnHFsh4sCieZ1-cXRDUvlTfrw6Rx_byQ76SaKP8/s1600/New+Orleans+018.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
My re-imersion into the Buddhist blogosphere, I'm afraid,
is going to make people uncomfortable. Particularly white people. And I hope it
does. But I ask of you, even beg of you, to persist, to stay with me as I
examine the topics I've been pondering the most of late. Whether it's about
race or queer identity, I will always attempt to provide a Buddhist framework,
or at least a framework based upon my own experience with Buddhism and from my
own reading of Buddhist texts.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And when I say "Buddhist texts," I'm not
talking about some book by some popular Rinpoche or a San Francisco Zen master.
I mean the Tipitika. Because the bottom line is even what some popular Rinpoche
or San Francisco Zen master writes must hold up when compared with the
Tipitika.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It's not just other people that I expect to make
uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable myself. And frankly, I think that's a good
thing. Because when we become aware of our personal discomfort and we are
willing to explore the source of that discomfort, real learning and
understanding takes place.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
You can't learn anything new if you think you already
know everything. The polarization of American politics should be evidence
enough of that (not that the polarization within American politics is anything
new, really; American politics has been polarized since the Constitution was
first ratified).</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Recently I started a new Tumblr blog that I call "<a href="http://bodyandvoice.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">Arf, She Said</a>." When you first
examine it, you might think there's no fixed theme to the items, mostly photos
and animated GIFs, I post there. But there is. And when I launched this new
Tumblr, I began following some other Tumblrs that more <a href="http://knowledgeequalsblackpower.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">specifically relate to race</a>
(others <a href="http://brandonkchao.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">tangentially</a>).</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It was via one of these Tumblrs that I came to <a href="http://www.salon.com/2014/02/07/the_history_white_people_need_to_learn/" target="_blank">read this article</a>. A particular line from the article jumped at me.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"In conversations about race, I’ve frequently tried
and failed to express the idea that whiteness is a social construct."</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And I was like, "Yes, yes!" And I know that
many of you reading this are also saying, "Yes, yes!" But the trouble
is the reason why I am saying "Yes, yes!" is very different from the
reason why some of you are saying the same thing.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
When I read those words, it was like a giant ball and
chain swung with such momentum and striking me in the chest, obliterating my
sense of being. But that's exactly what needs to happen. Sitting on a cushion
while contemplating beguiling notions such as "race is just a
fabrication" doesn't help anyone at all. Clinging to such a notion is,
bluntly put, a form of mental masturbation designed to give you momentary
pleasure at how awesome a person you are. All that does is distance yourself
from confronting the fabrication you carry around with you every where you go
and exude like a plume of noxious gas every time you take a breath: Your
privilege.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
"Well, you sanctimonious little shit."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
For many of you the initial reaction you'll have is I'm
labeling you an awful person, and you'll likely retort that you're a very
sympathetic white person who reads the right articles and votes for the right
people and policies and thinks the right thoughts. In fact, you'll probably get
angry with me, feel like I've just personally attacked you. That's not what I'm
saying at all. Frankly, if the Buddha has taught us anything, you're just not
that special to have such a self-centered reaction.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
This thing is I am very sympathetic to your reaction. You
still need to get over it. Just like I do. Everyday I discover how I act under
the cloak of privilege and repeatedly vow to avoid it next time, but there I
am, doing it again. As Ministry sings, the mind is a terrible thing to taste,
and this is all about the mind.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The Buddha's words to the young and bright Brahman
Assalayana show how resistant the mind can be to the privilege it creates. I
wrote about this in <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2010/10/know-when-to-hold-em-know-when-to-fold.html" target="_blank">a previous post</a>, but you can read the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.093.than.html" target="_blank">entire sutta here</a>. When the Buddha contradicted the Brahman premise, as presented by
Assalayana, that it is the superior caste and all other castes are "dark",
the teenaged Brahman does not disagree with the Buddha's answer, but repeats
every time that this is a difficult concept for the Brahmans to grasp. There
are other links within that post that are applicable to race and racism.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I don't expect all my posts to be about white privilege
and race, but a good many will. This is where I am, and this is how I'm using
my practice to investigate.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-47726525113291476022014-02-02T09:43:00.000-08:002014-02-02T12:05:12.544-08:00Buddhist privilege<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqkDdIrjrDQp_LtYJEvJOqDOgiTGF-bLqI_XEGSfLhcScYd9m381p_551LKETy5Q1tabYCaN1nKBmsmt02kc3dhUzEsR-wQ1nFKm_kYvsGVAyz-9Bae0eNUC59-BRo2ZosXBxvv2dVC-Y/s1600/22+November+005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqkDdIrjrDQp_LtYJEvJOqDOgiTGF-bLqI_XEGSfLhcScYd9m381p_551LKETy5Q1tabYCaN1nKBmsmt02kc3dhUzEsR-wQ1nFKm_kYvsGVAyz-9Bae0eNUC59-BRo2ZosXBxvv2dVC-Y/s1600/22+November+005.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"A bhikkhu who
has left behind all action,<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Shaking off the
dust of former deeds.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>The stable one,
unselfish, steady,<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Has no need to
address people."</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I used the "find a random sutta" function at
Access to Insight, and this is where I landed. It's ironic because for a while
I have been frustrated with self-professed Buddhists who far too frequently
share what I view to be a rather elitist attitude.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Particularly when it comes to issues such as race and
sexuality. And recognizing the risk in me saying this, I find that it's most
often white people who express unconsciously (and I do believe that for the
most part it is unconscious) this elitism in their Buddhist practice.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But the danger within this elitism is indifference. The
above passage, the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/ud/ud.3.01.irel.html" target="_blank">Kamma Sutta from The Udana</a>, I believe feeds this notion of
indifference.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
"Are you saying the Buddha was wrong?"
"Are you saying Buddhism is elitist?" "Are you suggesting I lack
compassion?"</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
These are often the responses I get whenever I bring such
matters up. It's a defensive reflex because most of us don't want to think of
ourselves as being, well, wrong.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But if you're a lay practitioner and you think the above
passage represents what Buddhism is all about, then I say, yes, you are wrong.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The Buddha had a wide variety of audiences. He was also
extraordinarily skilled at speaking to his various audiences in ways that allowed
his listeners to hear what they needed to hear.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
In the Kamma Sutta, we are reading about a monk deep in
meditation confronting the physical pain he's experiencing while sustaining his
meditative state - undisturbed and persistent. It is something this monk faces
on his own, there can be no others to lead him on this journey. The very nature
of this journey requires one to remove oneself from the distractions of lay
society. A monk in these circumstances does not need anyone else, has no need
to address other people.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But that's a monk. And I doubt I have more than just a
few monks among my readers. The majority of you are like me - lay people
struggling to do our best to be as harmless as possible.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The Buddha was not speaking to us in the Kamma Sutta. We
can listen to what he is saying here, but it must be with skillful ears.
Because I am not a monk, have no intention of becoming a monk, I must live in
this world. I cannot become withdrawn from this world because that would make
me indifferent to the suffering of others.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I need to feel the world.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And this is why I become frustrated with people who say
things with intellectual import such as, "Race is a fabrication, a
construct that is empty." They say this with a conviction that this is how
we become a non-racial society, how we go beyond racism - just keep repeating
that it's only a construct of the mind and all we need to do is realize that
and it goes away.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It doesn't work like that. Because racism and homophobia
and sexism and patriarchy and white privilege are all real. They are real because
not enough people are willing (or don't know how) to dismantle the
institutions that sustain them, because not enough people recognize how they
benefit from the continuing existence of these institutions, because too many
Buddhists view the practice as an academic exercise rather than a way of living
and thinking.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And breathing.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It's been a long time since I've written anything in this
blog. There are many reasons why, some of which remain hidden from me. But I am
going to ease myself back into this. I hope I can regain some of my irreverent
wit that made my blog enjoyable for others to read. I know I enjoyed it.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The reason I started this blog was I wanted an open venue
to process my journey with Buddhism, to share my thoughts and experiences from
a somewhat different perspective that I thought might not just benefit me, but
others also. I wanted it to be fun and not pedantic.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I'll get there. It's time I come back. So look out
bitches.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-6467240256792265052013-06-14T14:20:00.000-07:002013-06-14T19:38:38.515-07:00Running and the art of meditation<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUFTQsj0LlU8kVsK_92rAMK7iFzG2EJJfycD9IaxsYmYYd_AsiBw3HKNsePsCi2gf6a_U5haSKio9xi7-fqV8us7G2AZaOnE_A_BZGAIWMbLO9sz84KqqSfcAnpRXHUe1RW7__tE7NC-4/s1600/600566_10151941028242656_513673855_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUFTQsj0LlU8kVsK_92rAMK7iFzG2EJJfycD9IaxsYmYYd_AsiBw3HKNsePsCi2gf6a_U5haSKio9xi7-fqV8us7G2AZaOnE_A_BZGAIWMbLO9sz84KqqSfcAnpRXHUe1RW7__tE7NC-4/s320/600566_10151941028242656_513673855_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Years ago, I used to run. Not marathons, or even very long
distances. I pretty much stuck to running 1 mile each time. And I never ran in
a race. This was 30 years ago. I was young and full of spit. And I was also
running at the time in high altitude. So while not great, I felt pretty good
that I could run a mile in less than 9 minutes at 7,000 feet.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And oh yeah, I smoked at the time too. (Sometimes I ran
while under the influence of certain, um, chemicals - and in hiking boots)</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But my ankles started to get cranky with me, so I stopped
running and switched to swimming. Running is so much easier though because you
don't need a special place to run. To swim, however, you need a pool.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Hey Rich, what's this got to do with Buddhism?"</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Um, maybe nothing at all. Maybe everything.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Fully worn out is this
body, <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>a nest of disease, and
fragile. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>This foul mass breaks
up, <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>for death is the end
of life.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There you go, does that cheer you up?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Last December, I broke a bone in my foot, a small stress
fracture. I did it while walking on a treadmill. Went to a foot doctor who
fitted me with new orthotics. Told me I'd be able to run again.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So I was all geeked up and feeling like, wow, I can run
again, maybe I'll even train for a marathon!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2013/03/dont-get-lost-in-details.html" target="_blank">Then I had a heart attack in March</a>. But that was not going
to deter me, particularly when the docs said there was no blockage in my heart
to worry about.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I've been training for my first 5K, which is this Sunday,
since late April. I'm not quite running the entire distance yet, so my time is
between 40-41 minutes. But I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'm finding that I
don't mind running so much, and I've learned to pace myself without pressure to
run too fast.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I've heard of people who use running like meditation, or
they meditate while they run, or they get all Zen while they're running, or
whatever. I don't do any of that. I just run, try to pay attention to what my
body is doing, the rhythm of my movement, the flow of my breath, even with all
types of crazy shit going on inside my monkey mind. To me that's meditation:
being aware. For a long time I used to think the goal of Buddhism and
meditation was to turn off the mind's internal babble. But now I realize I
don't need to try and turn it off; rather, the more I pay attention to it, the
more it turns off on its own.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Thinking, at least for me, leads to self-absorption, and
that hinders compassion. It's hard to be compassionate when you're obsessed
with your self, what people think about you, how you think they perceive you or
think about you: It's all a mass of mental knots that stress you out.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Hey Rich, what's the photo with your post got to do
with any of this?"</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So glad you asked!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While on a run, I was loping along the east side of Diversey
Harbor here in Chicago when I see this raccoon up ahead. As I get closer, the
raccoon isn't moving. Dead? No, it raises its head to look at me, but still
doesn't move. I jog by, see it splayed out in the grass. It's injured.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I stop about 20 feet beyond it, look at it, see that it's
very stressed. We are quite close to Lake Shore Drive; my guess is the raccoon
was attempting to cross the drive, got hit, managed to drag itself this far.
It's hind legs weren't working.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Without thinking, I just started talking to the raccoon. And
I was pretty blunt. Heck, the raccoon was probably going to die, its injuries
mortal in nature, so I said that to the raccoon. I think it agreed with my
assessment. I called animal control because I didn't want anyone else messing
with the animal. People can be assholes. The guy at animal control took my information
and said he would call someone from the wildlife division. I told the raccoon;
maybe they could help you, I said.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The raccoon started to drag itself across the sidewalk
toward the harbor. It was going to deliberately throw itself into the harbor.
Was I about to witness a raccoon suicide?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You know the end is near, don't you, I said to it. It's
alright, we all have to go someday. Wish I could help you.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I spoke quietly, gently. It dragged itself a little more,
then paused at the edge of the cement wall. That's when I took the photo. It
paused for a moment, heaving from the exertion, then pulled itself over and
plunged into the harbor.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I peered over the edge, saw it paddle with its front legs,
the rear legs still useless. I bet that cold water feels good, but if you take
off, the wildlife people won't find you and fix you.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It looked up at me as it paddled along the edge. Screw the
wildlife people, I don't need them, it said.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Oh, wait, it didn't say anything. Raccoons can't talk. It
just looked up at me and swam away.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have no idea what happened to that raccoon. My presumption
is the injuries were fatal. I just hope that in its last moments, my presence
brought it a little comfort, reduced its stress just a tad as it faced the end.
Because, you know, when I die, I hope someone will be there with me too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
And now when I run by that spot on my loop, I put my palms
together and bow my head in respect for the raccoon who gave me a lesson on
both life and death.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-11848875127016286322013-05-22T08:33:00.001-07:002013-05-31T19:41:06.663-07:00Someone tell Mark Sanford about Angulimala<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU219czBZlh1kE-VkR9n7DOG4dEwlNhOgy24HEs9FYJ-HtBZGxeISGT64p9D35EH-vYUSoag9-i582zXRrcWAjoGuGgkQxu5aXulhAcUuiWLVFhcm2YxF_9u6F__ow4M0Fb_mk9s8yr_4/s1600/946370_565980826775392_1754220603_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU219czBZlh1kE-VkR9n7DOG4dEwlNhOgy24HEs9FYJ-HtBZGxeISGT64p9D35EH-vYUSoag9-i582zXRrcWAjoGuGgkQxu5aXulhAcUuiWLVFhcm2YxF_9u6F__ow4M0Fb_mk9s8yr_4/s320/946370_565980826775392_1754220603_n.jpg" width="214" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Mark Sanford is a funny guy. After embarrassing himself
and his state - but seriously, is it really possible to embarrass South Carolina?-
by carrying on an illicit love affair in the Southern Hemisphere while governor
and attempting to throw off discovery by claiming he suddenly decided to hike
the Appalachian Trail, he has seen fit to rise from political exile and run
from Congress.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
As if people would forget about, oh, I don't know, that
whole marital infidelity thing.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But Sanford's no dummy, because while most voters will
remember their former governor's previous juvenile horn-doggery, they just
might ignore that transgression and choose, instead, to view Sanford as an
opportunity to throw more obstruction at that evil black president.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
We'll have to wait and see how Machiavellian South
Carolina voters really are. And if they're not so inclined to give Sanford
another chance at public office, we shall then see how Machiavellian Sanford
had been. Because in his effort to turn over a new leaf, it appears that
Sanford has become, well, Buddhist.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I was enlightened about Sanford's "practice" by
<a href="http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/ticket/mark-sanford-talks-buddhism-daily-meditation-practice-unique-000939600.html" target="_blank">this article in Yahoo! News</a>. Apparently after Sanford's political demise, he
retreated from the spotlight and began learning about Buddhism and
even asserts he has begun meditating; at least that's what he calls it. It's
difficult to tell just what type of practice Sanford has begun, what were his
influences, and how serious he is about it. The article was scant on detail.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Understandably, <a href="http://www.fitsnews.com/2013/05/11/mark-sanford-representative-buddha/" target="_blank">people are skeptical</a>. It's likely that the only Buddhist thing Sanford is up to is
working a little bit of mindfulness into his life. After all, if he's really
taking a serious look at Buddhism, he will need to confront one of its basic
concepts: <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2011/02/gradients-of-kamma.html" target="_blank">Karma</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Someone needs to tell Mark Sanford <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/hecker/wheel312.html" target="_blank">about Angulimala</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Angulimala was a murderous thief who killed travelers and
cut off their fingers to wear in a gruesome necklace about his neck. Despite
the wide-spread fear Angulimala inspired in others, the Buddha successfully
tamed this beast and turned him into a monk.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But Angulimala
quickly learned that simply becoming a monk and following the Buddha didn't
erase his past, unlike the concept of being "born again." In fact, even after the Buddha accepted him
into the sangha, Angulimala's past continued to catch up with him.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
At first, Angulimala couldn’t get anyone to offer him
food during his alms rounds because he remained feared and despised for all of
his past murderous actions. Even after the Buddha set up an act of truth to
show others Angulimala’s new noble birth and he became accepted by more
villagers, there remained a group who refused to believe that Angulimala was
nothing more than a murderous monster. Whenever he went for alms, these
holdouts threw rocks and sticks at him. One time he comes to the Buddha, his
head bleeding, to show the Buddha what had happened. The Buddha tells
Angulimala to buck up and endure this because he is lucky to be suffering this
torment now as the continuing fruits of his past actions rather than to suffer
those consequences by spending eons in a hell realm.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Angulimala does buck up and eventually he attains the
fruits of the holy life, but it wasn't easy. It took considerable time for him
to work through all the karma he had accumulated as a murderous thief.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Will Mark Sanford buck up and comprehend that he doesn't
get a free pass? That he may be suffering the consequences of this extramarital
excursions to Argentina for years to come? Should Sanford lose his bid for
Congress, we shall see whether he continues his dabbling in Buddhist practices,
or abandons it as a failed expedient device. And even if he wins, who knows how
his past karma will continue to manifest itself. The mere fact that he might
win is no indication that he has completed that karmic journey.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
As the farmer in a fable about the various fortunes and
misfortunes of his son said to his neighbor: "We'll have to wait and
see."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Image courtesy of <a href="https://www.facebook.com/Buddhism.BTH?hc_location=stream" target="_blank">Buddhism - Being Truly Human</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-53369991325971362222013-03-25T20:29:00.000-07:002013-03-25T20:29:15.399-07:00Don't get lost in the details<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia0s1uYF1Dd9CDfTWwcCGtudWVXIGmrNRXd_Bm_jMWAPz4FaHEl1Bpjqe4a5rVxts5FKxpA0bE_lFm6F1BqC997uaY9ejQGIbJQtOmlP11DENMaUGa5w8asHUCTA5N-A5MCOWNyiggAdE/s1600/Boston+graffiti.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia0s1uYF1Dd9CDfTWwcCGtudWVXIGmrNRXd_Bm_jMWAPz4FaHEl1Bpjqe4a5rVxts5FKxpA0bE_lFm6F1BqC997uaY9ejQGIbJQtOmlP11DENMaUGa5w8asHUCTA5N-A5MCOWNyiggAdE/s320/Boston+graffiti.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
For 2 years in a row, the date March 9 has brought me
face-to-face with the frailty of the human body.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
This normally inconspicuous date has also held for me
interesting coincidences.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
On March 9, 2012, I awoke shortly after midnight with a
splitting headache. It was the worst headache I ever had in my life. It was as
though a large Bowie knife had been shoved through my skull. My vision was
distorted by shimmering lights, like an aura. Because I had lived with
migraines most of my life, I deduced it was just an exceptionally bad migraine.
I took some Excedrin and went back to sleep.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Later that morning the headache persisted. I stayed at
home and worked, but the throbbing pain in my skull was getting to me. I took a
handful of aspirin later in the afternoon. The pain diminished slightly. I was
beginning to notice that I had lost vision in my left peripheral field. It was
the normal blind spot I get when having a migraine, so I thought.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The next day, the headache and the blind spot were still
there. Perhaps this was not a migraine. I called one of those "phone a
nurse" lines and described my symptoms. It was suggested that I get to an
emergency room. I drove myself there. They did a CT scan. They told me I had a
stroke.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
On March 9, 2013, I woke up feeling fine. I went to make
the coffee. I returned to my room and started my laptop, started to look
through my email. When I heard the coffee had stopped brewing, I went and got a
cup. I poured the soy creamer into the mug and then added the coffee like I always
do every morning. I took the mug of coffee back to my room, took a sip, set the
mug on the side table, then sat in the chair to resume web surfing.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Suddenly there was an intense pain in my chest. It was as
if a giant hand wearing one of those metal medieval jousting gloves had gripped
my chest all about the left breast and was squeezing with the pressure of an
hydraulic vice. The pain radiated to my left arm, went under through the arm
pit, then down my arm to my fingers. This intense pain went up the left side of
my neck as well to my jaw. My breathing became shallow, I felt clammy.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I knew what was happening. I stood up, went to my
medicine cabinet, grabbed an adult aspirin and chewed it. I returned to my
chair and focused my mind on the pain, on my heart, on the blood vessel that
was shutting down. I waited a few moments, but the pain was not subsiding. It
was steady; a black knight had me in his grip and he was not letting go. Mara
be damned. I was going to have to go to the emergency room. Again.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I told my roommate what I thought was happening and he
and his boyfriend drove me to the emergency room. I never felt like I was going
to die. But I was thinking about the irony.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Two hugely significant medical emergencies in my life,
both occurring on March 9. In both incidents, I had Phô for dinner the night
before. In both situations I had recently picked up my friend Curt at the
airport upon his return from Malaysia where he had spent three months. And on
both occasions, Curt returned from Malaysia with some type of lung infection.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Coincidences. Silly facts to mess with your mind.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
At the emergency room, it had been at least an hour since
the symptoms first showed and my chest was still gripped with pain. This is not
a hackneyed metaphor. It literally felt as though my chest was caught in some
giant vice. My blood pressure upon arrival was 188/107. They gave me a nitro. A
swelling headache developed, but the chest pain had only slightly subsided.
Morphine was next. At last, the pain was receding.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
They drew blood to see if the tell-tale enzymes would
show up indicating a heart attack. It could be severe angina or some other less
serious event. These enzymes show up when there is heart tissue damage, and the
only thing that causes that type of damage is a heart attack. The first draw
was necessarily zero, but it would be the second draw that would reveal all.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Nammo tassa bhagavato arahato samma sambuddhasa. Say it
three times. Say it six times. Say it a hundred times. I wasn't afraid. I knew
I wasn't going to die. But I was embarrassed. And I was confused. I don't
follow the best diet, but I eat reasonably well and I exercise a lot. My cholesterol
numbers are fabulous. My EKGs have been normal. I have never felt chest pain
while exercising or exerting myself. All I did was sit down after getting my
coffee. Now I was annoyed. They told me I would be spending the night for
observation in a regular room. Dennis and Stephen went home to get me some
things.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Then the first enzyme test came back. They were canceling
my room. They were sending me to ICU. The enzymes were there. I was 54 years
old and I had a heart attack. My father was 58 when he had his first one. My
brother was 62 I think when he had his, one that required a quad-bypass. But
this couldn't be. I knew I didn't have blocked arteries. I just knew it! But
what was happening?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
An angiogram done two days later confirmed my belief;
there was no arterial blockage. They started talking about a spasm, like a
cramp in the artery that caused it to pinch shut, blocking the blood flow just
as effectively if it had been blocked with plaque. But there was a problem with
this diagnosis. Had it been plaque in the artery, they would cite a source,
whether it was my diet or something else leading to the plaque buildup. There
were procedures for this, whether surgery or angioplasty, doesn't matter -
there was a protocol with that scenario.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Without the plaque, well now, they couldn't tell me what
caused the spasm. And without knowing what caused the spasm, they couldn't very
well tell me what to do or not do to prevent it from happening again.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It was like the stroke all over again. The stroke was
caused by a blood clot - at least that's what they tell me - but they could
never identify the source of the clot.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
My roommate Stephen said it best: "You are a medical
mystery."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Fuck that.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But now, when I chant the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an05/an05.057.than.html" target="_blank">Five Remembrances</a>, the
significance is hard to ignore. I got things to do. And not silly things. Now
the <i><a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.131.than.html" target="_blank">Bhaddekaratta Sutta</a></i> has meaning unlike anything its held before. And yet I am
still the same person. I'm not quite acting differently, not yet. But I am
looking at others much differently. And I'm looking for opportunities.
Opportunities to help. Opportunities to be kind. Opportunities to smile. And
most important of all, opportunities to be present.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Expect some more of the same, but a little bit different.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-65093452747772686502013-02-07T14:19:00.001-08:002013-02-07T14:31:25.981-08:00Healthy prostates and virtual experience<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So I thought I would talk about frequent masturbation today.
No, seriously, I want to talk about frequent masturbation. And dependent
origination. Not for the entirety of this particular post, but for a good part
of it. The masturbation part, that is.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
One of my favorite YouTube channels (how's that for a
transition?) is the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/user/vlogbrothers" target="_blank">Vlogbrothers</a>. These guys are totally cool and very gay
friendly. If you haven't checked them out before, you should. They are awesome!
And what really got me thinking about the Buddha's teaching on dependent
origination was a recent video of theirs, which you may watch below.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="225" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/KboR0Iw96Hk" width="400"></iframe>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br />
This video brings up something very interesting, and
that's the question of whether a real experience is fundamentally different
from a virtual experience. That's a very Buddhist question, particularly when
you consider the Buddha's teachings on dependent origination, also known as
dependent co-arising. There are a number of suttas on this topic, but <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/dn/dn.15.0.than.html" target="_blank">this one linked here</a> I will use for reference.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
From a strictly biological perspective, when we
"perceive reality," we are really experiencing the past, because no
matter how fast our neurons work, by the time we are "conscious" of an
event or experience, that event or experience is already over! Adds an entire
new dimension to the concept of living in the present moment, doesn't it?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And what we experience as "reality" is just
sensation turned into electrical stimuli in our brains via various chemical
reactions and the movement of nifty neurotransmitters. We can create
"false" realities by manipulating these chemicals in our brain, which
is what a lot of humanity does when it consumers alcohol or other mind-altering
substances. We tend to label these experiences as not real, but the fact is our
brain responds to these experiences, and ergo our mind, as though they are just
as real as a real experience.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
As the Maha-nidana Sutta explains, everything exists
because of what precedes that something. Why do we die? We die because we are
born. Why are we born? We are born because of what the Buddha called
"becoming," which is a process initiated by clinging, and this is
preceded by craving for the thing we cling to, and that's preceded by feeling,
which is preceded by contact (as in sensory contact), and that is preceded by
name-and-form because we have to label everything, and that is preceded by
consciousness, which is, whoops! Consciousness is preceded by name-and-form!</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Work that one out sonny!</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The Buddha's teaching on dependent origination is
critical to his entire teaching, and the simplest way to explain it is nothing
arises out of nothing, something never becomes nothing. Which, if you think
about it for just a second, is basic physics. Matter and energy are neither
created nor destroyed, but only change form. The Buddha said all you have to do
is interrupt that chain anywhere along the line and you've done it - you've
attained Nirvana and then you will go from being something into being nothing
when you die. Because what is the origin or death? It's birth. And what is the
origin of birth? It's because we are becoming. And why are we becoming? Because
we are clinging, etc.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Which brings us back to our brain and eventually
masturbation of the male variety.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
If what we experience is nothing but how our brain
processes various stimuli, which result in various feelings we have about that
experience, is something we really experience truly different from something we
virtually experience?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Consider the prostate gland. While the data isn't
universally conclusive, the preponderance of data suggests that <a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/3072021.stm" target="_blank">frequent masturbation</a> in men contributes to better overall prostate health and a lower
risk of cancer. Wait, let me back that up. What the studies really are saying
is ejaculating several times a week contributes to better overall prostate
health and a lower risk of prostate cancer than ejaculating less frequently, as
in just a couple times a month. And what causes ejaculation? Well, there's
either sex or masturbation. Yes, you can throw in there nocturnal emissions,
but they hardly count even as sex.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
There are a few studies that seem to present conflicting
data, <a href="http://www.webmd.com/prostate-cancer/news/20090127/masturbation-and-prostate-cancer-risk" target="_blank">such as this one</a> that suggests that wanking too often in your 20s may increase
your risk for prostate cancer, while wanking in your 50s decreases that risk.
But <a href="http://open.salon.com/blog/amytuteurmd/2009/01/28/the_truth_about_masturbation_and_prostate_cancer" target="_blank">this article debunks</a> that by pointing out the methodology employed in these
studies is flawed.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So I'm sticking with the frequent masturbation is good
scenario.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Hence, does the prostate gland care if you're having real
sex or just doing the rattlesnake shake? No, it does not! All it cares about is
expelling some happy juice on a semi-regular basis. And for that matter, we can
add the experience of orgasm to this. Is the sensation of orgasm created from
masturbating fundamentally different from the sensation of
orgasm during real sex with a real person? While I am extremely hesitant to
answer that question, the basic premise would suggest no, there really is no fundamental difference.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Regardless of the stimuli, it all becomes part of the
sequence of events the Buddha outlined in his teaching on dependent
origination. Our suffering, our dissatisfaction with the transitory nature of
our experiences, feelings and of our very lives is wrapped up all the same
whether we cling to real or false things.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
S<span style="font-family: inherit;">o no, John, there is no difference between seeing the
London Tower Bridge in London while standing along the Thames and seeing the
London Tower Bridge in your video.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">But
I'd rather see it in London than in your video.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span>Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-71809722823744451322013-02-03T08:17:00.001-08:002013-02-03T08:17:50.027-08:00Groundhog Day Dhamma<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihHQql5TGECHdsNpOVrXQ1Jl1IZm8B4hmXa_g4OkKDKu5QUEf2x7bvy0SKp83-4cDSpileLGIKxDemMHoxVs3ykRS2zUA6p8pgqHmATDfaaB0S0P-FcMbDFhw7yfXkKhJbh-ESo7Wk3Sk/s1600/13584_509178459122296_1195722464_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihHQql5TGECHdsNpOVrXQ1Jl1IZm8B4hmXa_g4OkKDKu5QUEf2x7bvy0SKp83-4cDSpileLGIKxDemMHoxVs3ykRS2zUA6p8pgqHmATDfaaB0S0P-FcMbDFhw7yfXkKhJbh-ESo7Wk3Sk/s320/13584_509178459122296_1195722464_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
OK, stop throwing shade. I know I'm a day late on this.
But when was the last time you knew of a gay man showing up on time for
anything? I thought so. I was caught by surprise anyway to learn that it was
already Groundhog Day. Somehow I envisioned this momentous event occurring a
bit later. Had I known I would have thrown a special fete and bought a new
shirt or something. Well, I did buy a couple CDs yesterday.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Anyway, while I was on a stationary bicycle at the gym
trying to burn off some portliness I had accumulated during my absence from
exercise the past six weeks because of a broken foot, I happened to see on the
television screen on the stationary bicycle next to me (yes, those mini TV's
are ubiquitous at just about every gym these days) Bill Murray in the scene
from the movie "Groundhog Day" when he wakes up the day after
Groundhog Day and realizes that he's finally broken the cycle of the same day
being repeated over and over, leading him to nearly lose his mind.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Wow, that was a seriously long sentence.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But the point is when he wakes up on the morning after
Groundhog Day, he realizes that he can move forward now. The joy it brings him
is sublime. He experiences a satisfaction so supreme that he remains motivated
to continue walking the same path that led him to cease being the self-centered
and selfish prick he had been at the start of the movie.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I have always thought that this movie presented the
principle theme of the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.131.than.html" target="_blank">Bhaddekaratta Sutta</a> extraordinarily well.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
o_O What has a movie featuring a corpulent rodent and an
insensitive man who continually alienates himself from others because of his
lack of compassion and empathy to do with the Buddha's Dhamma, you ask?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
A lot more than you may think. And this movie is also
instructive when you think about some of the other teachings of the Buddha I
mention frequently in my blog posts.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Bill Murray's character, Phil, is a crass and insensitive
television meteorologist who has the hots for Andie MacDowell's character,
Rita, his producer. But Rita wants nothing to do with Phil because he is crass
and insensitive. In fact, Phil's relationships with others are so poisoned by
his flippant selfishness that his co-workers tolerate him solely because on
air, his audience loves him.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
People who are unlikable do not become unlikable in a
moment; rather, such a person creates this persona over time with the way he or
she manifests his or her intentions into actions or words while interacting with
others. It is usually a gradual process, much like slowly <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an03/an03.099.than.html" target="_blank">adding salt to a large glass of water</a>. If you add one salt crystal to the water, you will not
taste it. But if you continue to add salt to the water, it will eventually
become so salty it is undrinkable.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Phil is a glass of water so salty that no one wants to
take even the merest sip. And the point is Phil has done this on his own
through his interactions with his co-workers. As expected, he continues to
behave the way he does with the expectation that others will accommodate his
selfishness and self-absorbed ego as he and his crew travel to cover a weather
forecasting "rat," as he calls Punxsutawney Phil.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And then a curious thing occurs. When Phil wakes up the
following morning, he soon realizes that it is Groundhog Day all over again.
The next day, the same. And the next day, and so on. Phil becomes frustrated
because like many of us, he has always expected the world around him to
accommodate his actions and character. But the world suddenly refuses to budge.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Slowly, Phil begins to adapt, shown when he learns to
avoid the puddle he always steps in every morning. And he begins to see an
opportunity to change, although his motivation remains selfish: he wants Rita.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Nothing wrong with starting a new path when motivated by
selfish reasons. The point is to strike out a new path and stop doing
everything the same way while still expecting different results. Much like the
Buddha's <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.061.than.html" target="_blank">teaching to his son Rahula</a>, Phil reflects on his actions and the
likely consequences they bring. He seeks a specific result - that Rita will
fall in love with him - and so he gradually modifies his actions and his speech
until he develops the behaviors that lead him to his desired result.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Along the way, something completely unintended occurs:
Phil develops compassion. This is shown through his futile efforts to save a
local homeless man and prevent his ultimate death. Phil believes, based on
everything else he's been doing, that he can find a way to create a different
tomorrow for this homeless man, but despite his repeated efforts, the man
always dies.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Phil learns to let go. This is extraordinarily important.
Because if Phil doesn't learn to let go, then his initial selfish motivation to
change won't fully transform into real human compassion. But he does let go and
his desire for Rita is no longer motivated by greed. Phil learns at last how to
live within the moment, becoming fully aware that how he behaves right now is
creating his future.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>You shouldn't chase after the past<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>or place expectations on the future.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>What is past<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> is
left behind.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>The future<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> is as
yet unreached.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Whatever quality is present<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>you clearly see right there,<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i> right there.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Just as the Buddha taught, Phil eventually realized the
opportunity he had to change the direction of his karma, to ultimately erase
his karma. We all have that same opportunity to do that. Every day is a new
opportunity to become more aware of the present, another chance to relinquish
our grip on the past, and recognize that what we think, say, and do in this moment
will shape our future.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
This is Buddhism. This is the path I strive to follow.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-22606846898875408482013-01-19T09:07:00.000-08:002013-01-19T09:40:05.667-08:0040 years after Roe<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCxbHqezmwvTIdn4eEGewOarhK5hfsDNMD0G191sM4v_mMPTNGC_8MwGv6ENRN0Hdq5Y84Ffg5sxQkh4UHuXE-a4CY6CMIfQML3AL9b_6oyRG6owzxIsdz6flnSmzDB9b5LnEcgAukW2A/s1600/73386_510113902362085_564849487_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCxbHqezmwvTIdn4eEGewOarhK5hfsDNMD0G191sM4v_mMPTNGC_8MwGv6ENRN0Hdq5Y84Ffg5sxQkh4UHuXE-a4CY6CMIfQML3AL9b_6oyRG6owzxIsdz6flnSmzDB9b5LnEcgAukW2A/s320/73386_510113902362085_564849487_n.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Forty years ago <a href="http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/comment/2013/01/this-is-forty-the-anniversary-of-roe-v-wade.html?" target="_blank">we got Roe v Wade</a>. And the battle has waged ever since. Forgive
the length of this post, but I want to share my thoughts on this divisive
topic. And while my thoughts are not necessarily "Buddhist" in construction,
how I feel about this topic is guided by my Buddhist understanding of how the
world works.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
First, I must clearly state that personally I believe
that taking another person's life, including that of an unborn person, is
simply wrong in any and all circumstances -- <i>even in self-defense</i>. I believe
that way because killing another person represents an outcome one has hurled
him or herself toward through a series of extraordinarily poor decisions that
could have been interrupted just about anywhere along the way.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Having said that, should I find myself in a situation
that defending my own life means taking another's, I suspect I will fight to
the death. But if I should emerge from such a fray victorious, there will be
consequences for my actions. Even if I am found legally innocent of any
criminal act, I will nonetheless face the karmic consequences of my actions,
consequences that may manifest themselves in any number of ways, not the least
of which will be an unsettled mind that will on a daily basis struggle with
what I did and how I might have avoided it.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I cannot foresee every situation, but I can take steps
right now to avoid potential situations that may put me in a position of
behaving in a manner contrary to the way I believe. And on occasion, despite my
intentions, I do act unskillfully and find myself in awkward situations.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But I got there because of the choices I made, even when
I thought the choices I was making were good ones.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Which is a long, round-about way of explaining why,
despite my personal belief that taking someone's life, including that of the
unborn, is always wrong and never without consequence, I will fight to ensure
that abortion is kept legal and easily accessed.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
To impose my personal belief on another person about whom
I know nothing, about whose life challenges I know nothing, strikes
me as a supreme form of righteousness that frankly makes me sick. Yes, perhaps
that person made a series of poor decisions, but they were his or her
decisions and to suggest that I know what consequences he or she should suffer
and how these consequences out to be delivered when my own life is far from
perfect - well, I'm not a Christian, but it seems to me that Jesus said
something about fretting over the speck of dust in another person's eye while
ignoring the rock in my own.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The Buddha taught us also that all our actions have
consequence and that we cannot always predict the outcomes of our actions. Besides,
there are some things, the Buddha taught, that <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn56/sn56.031.than.html" target="_blank">we really don't need to know</a>. Despite that he gave us tips, such as his <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.061.than.html" target="_blank">guidance to his son Rahula</a>, to avoid making unskillful choices, and with the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an03/an03.099.than.html" target="_blank">simile of the salt crystal</a> he explains that we have the ability to mitigate future
consequences via our current actions. The Buddha is also quite clear with the
story of <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2011/02/gradients-of-kamma.html" target="_blank">Angulimala</a>
that while we have the option to renounce our past completely and pick up a
new, more virtuous life - sort of like being 'born again' - we can never escape
our past and the consequences we have set in motion.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Believing this, I know that anyone facing the ominous
decision of abortion has been through a series of events leading her to that
choice and that she will experience consequences unknown to me - and frankly
none of my business - that she may or may not be able to resolve in her current
life.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Even if you don't believe as I do, there are societal
benefits to having legal access to abortion, and one of these benefits is not
always part of the public discussion: The impact legal abortion has on crime.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
What raised this connection was a <a href="http://qje.oxfordjournals.org/content/116/2/379.abstract" target="_blank">2001 study</a>
that is highly cited within the scientific literature and at the time of its
release got a fair bit of attention in the popular press. But since then it has
oddly disappeared from the primary discourse. The study notes that crime rates
in the U.S. began a decline roughly 18 years after Roe v. Wade, and in states
where abortion was already legal and widely available as early as 1970, crimes
rights there began a similar decline much earlier than the rest.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
While purely correlative, it does strongly suggest a
causative relationship when you consider certain key facts about crime: who
commits the most crime, and what environmental circumstances are more likely to
lead a person to crime than others. Let's start with the last and work
backwards.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
For starters, it's pretty well established that low
income areas have higher crime rates than more affluent neighborhoods; that
low-income households produce more members who commit crime; that substance
abuse is strongly connected with crime. In my journalism career I've worked
with many police chiefs and sheriffs who repeatedly said that if we, as a
society, could get a handle on substance abuse, crime would drop out of sight -
<i>especially alcohol abuse</i>. While
things like meth and crack and other harder drugs certainly are connected with
crime, the law enforcement folk I worked with universally said alcohol abuse is
the number one problem.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It is also pretty well established that those who
regularly commit crime are individuals with a number of behavioral and
character flaws. Often these flaws develop in childhood while being raised in
highly stressed households, either economically or emotionally. For about 15
years I worked with delinquent and emotionally disturbed children and not a
single one of them was unable to sense on some level that their parents just
really didn't want them. As one boy told me, "My mother had a choice to
keep me or the dog. She kept the dog."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Growing up in that type of environment frequently leads
to substance abuse, which law enforcement will universally will say is the <i>sin
quo non</i> of most crime. Substance abuse impairs one's decision making skills,
and criminal activity is the result of flawed decisions.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Next, who commits the most crime? Crime statistics year
after year report the same thing: most crime is committed by young men between
the ages of 18 and about 26. In fact, it is mostly young men of color.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Maybe it's starting to become clear how abortion plays
into this. Because a reasonable hypothesis to make based on the above
information is that there ought to be a decline in the population most likely
to commit a crime roughly 18 years after abortion becomes legal, which in turn
should result in a decline in the number of crimes committed.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And that's exactly what this country saw. Just take some
time and <a href="http://www.disastercenter.com/crime/uscrime.htm" target="_blank">look at this chart</a>. Starting in 1960, the data shows crime continuing to rise along with
population. But low and behold, beginning in 1991, we see that trend reversing!
And when we look at the specific types of crimes more likely to be committed by
a young male - property crimes, robbery, and vehicle theft - the reversal in
trend is even more pronounced despite a few stutters between 1991-93. There's
even a reversal in murders committed started in 1993.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Granted, this does not on its own suggest a causative
relationship, but it's nonetheless worth noting and worth further study. It's
quite reasonable to conclude - and Occam's razor would suggest this as well - that
with abortion legal and widely available, you have fewer unwanted children born
and being raised in highly-stressed conditions that are very closely associated
with anti-social behavior such as substance abuse and criminal activity.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
In Buddhism, virtually all unskillful behavior arises out
of either greed, hatred, or delusion. As a man, let alone a gay man, imposing
on women this notion that they must carry to birth all pregnancies no matter
how conceived is far more evil than terminating an unwanted pregnancy.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Any woman who faces that choice is facing a terrible
decision, and not all of them do so with caprice. In fact, I firmly believe
that most do not look at such a choice without it weighing heavy on their hearts
and minds.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It is their choice and should remain so.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-10746101583165296312012-10-27T07:55:00.000-07:002012-11-06T19:38:25.907-08:00How Sigala avoided a honey of a boo boo<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVW-MSrUql6H2v73QFKI4JGlWRHqchjOhuL3SowhNIqmVr6JnMe3X7zOVd-hj9FgHVoTMYXOvnhO2B06bsiXa1rcCQ_kIb3LLeyzviP1DK6aiQAhK3SLc2tvXImeVlaUp2yJKgjYCvQjk/s1600/428777_10151206972402656_131917847_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVW-MSrUql6H2v73QFKI4JGlWRHqchjOhuL3SowhNIqmVr6JnMe3X7zOVd-hj9FgHVoTMYXOvnhO2B06bsiXa1rcCQ_kIb3LLeyzviP1DK6aiQAhK3SLc2tvXImeVlaUp2yJKgjYCvQjk/s320/428777_10151206972402656_131917847_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Buddhism, in part, is about asking questions to determine
how things really are. But to truly see the truth, you have to ask the right
questions. And the question on my mind at the moment is whether Honey Boo Boo
is foreshadowing the decline of civilization.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Homo say what? Honey Boo Boo?</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
A friend and former colleague examined this question <a href="http://www.themorningsun.com/article/20121025/OPINION03/121029749/eric-baerren-a-sad-reflection-of-modern-times&pager=full_story" target="_blank">in a recent column</a> he wrote for The Morning Sun, a newspaper in Mount
Pleasant, Mich., and one I worked for in the past. Please take the time to read
it, as it is excellent. And don't feign ignorance with me; I know all you moes
out there know about Honey Boo Boo, because she is exactly the archetype and
stereotype of breeder culture that we love to throw so much shade over that it
becomes a black hole. And I bet many of you watched this train wreck of
humanity more than once.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Come to the light, children, there is still hope for you.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
While I may sound a bit holier-than-though when I say
this, it is true: I have not, nor will I, watch Honey Boo Boo. I did watch an
online trailer for the show prior to its indecorous debut and that was enough.
I wanted to cleanse my eyes with Comet after that. I saw enough, however, to
know instantly that civilization was perched upon a perilous precipice, over
which it could tumble into oblivion at any moment.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
My friend clearly points out in his column that we, in a
collective sense, have only ourselves to blame for this type of programming dreck.
He writes:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"You can blame the network all you want, but the
people who run the network have a very simple mission: Make money. They do that
by reducing costs and maximizing viewers. Quality costs money and doesn’t bring
the right number of viewers to make it the most profitable way to do business.
So, we get Honey Boo Boo.”</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And to add insult to injury, the folks in TV land have
created elaborate methods to convince you that the programming available is, in
fact, high quality backed by tons of creative minds. It's done through the
annual awards show that lavishes praise on the most popular programs with idols
of pseudo-excellence, which is why programs like "Glee" churn out
episode after episode creating new nadirs for every conceivable sexual, racial,
and ethnic stereotype out there and cleverly confuses you into thinking that
it's really a ground-breaking and inclusive show portraying gays and others in
a positive, albeit humorous, light.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
It's all a diversion designed to lull you into a false
sense of happiness so that you will more readily accept the commercial content that
batters your psyche with often better production quality than the programs it
sponsors. Its intent is to stupify you in a manner Bob Dylan eloquently
described in his song, "It's Alright Ma (I'm Only Bleeding)".</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Advertising signs they con</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>You into thinking you’re the one</i></div>
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<i>That can do what’s never been done</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>That can win what’s never been won</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Meantime life outside goes on</i></div>
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<i>All around you</i></div>
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<br /></div>
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This is precisely why the Buddha advised a young fellow
named Sigala to avoid theatrical shows.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
o_O</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Patience my pretties. I think that a reason why many
practitioners do not read Dhamma is quite similar why other folk do not read
the Bible or whatever holy book guides their religion, and this is the language
in these texts is archaic and not easily understood. For that reason, it can be
easily viewed as irrelevant to today's culture.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
For example, in the <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/dn/dn.31.0.nara.html" target="_blank"><i>Sigalovada Sutta</i></a>, the Buddha includes "watching theatrical shows" as an item
in a list of activities that lead to the loss of wealth. And then he enumerates
the reasons why and how watching theatrical shows result in this:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"There are, young householder, these six evil
consequences in frequenting theatrical shows. He is ever thinking:</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>(i) where is there dancing?</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>(ii) where is there singing?</i></div>
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<i>(iii) where is there music?</i></div>
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<i>(iv) where is there recitation?</i></div>
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<i>(v) where is there playing with cymbals?</i></div>
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<i>(vi) where is there pot-blowing?</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Pot-blowing? What the hell is that? And what's wrong with
singing and dancing?</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
This is what I'm talking about. People look at this and
think that Buddhism has no relevance for them. The problem, however, is not
that Buddhism lacks relevance; the problem is the question - we aren't asking
the right questions.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
No, there is nothing wrong with singing, or dancing, or
even pot-blowing, provided we don't get too carried away. Remember that the
Buddha described his path as the middle way. He tried the extremes and found
them lacking. The path to spiritual bliss is neither followed by extreme pleasure or by
extreme deprivation. And while we follow the way in the middle, we must be
honest in evaluating our emotions.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Remember what the First Noble Truth is? For many people,
life is more than just unsatisfactory, it can really suck, and too many of us
queer folk know this all too well. But for most people life is how Henry David
Thoreau described it when he said, <i>“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.”</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Believe it or not, shows like Honey Boo Boo are tapping
into a collective sense of dismay and dissatisfaction that permeates our lives.
It presents an opportunity, albeit a false one, for us to watch someone else's
life self-destruct and gives us a sense that things can't be all that bad,
"thank god I'm not in Honey Boo Boo's family!"</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But like the theatrical shows the Buddha warned Sigala
about, this is a distraction that keeps us in our self-dug hole of
dissatisfaction. Shows like Honey Boo Boo aren't designed to uplift us, to
inspire us; they're designed to keep us in a rut of meaningless existence, to
set us up for the next string of commercials that will entice us to spend money
on goods and services we don't need and which, if we took just a few seconds to
think about it, we don't want.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
There are a lot of unhappy people in the world. We can't help
them all. But are you at least trying to help a few of them?</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I know that I am not. And that needs to change.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-4661779789164909452012-10-08T15:11:00.001-07:002013-05-31T19:49:08.045-07:00Homophobe say what?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKJ5dogBfWeKhYiWMuUg4nNpNV0AiWYLEUWldnC2HJEhbcyxs2WCGk1mQ7z7lazJmjYK7EdRGb5hnPbQJGDY-tSzJCgitzMHzoyWWuhcVs0keWVzIev74y8SS1_mvOpvFcr93AdvbEpuw/s1600/PICT0014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKJ5dogBfWeKhYiWMuUg4nNpNV0AiWYLEUWldnC2HJEhbcyxs2WCGk1mQ7z7lazJmjYK7EdRGb5hnPbQJGDY-tSzJCgitzMHzoyWWuhcVs0keWVzIev74y8SS1_mvOpvFcr93AdvbEpuw/s400/PICT0014.JPG" width="252" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Few things can get my Hugo Boss tighty-whities in a
bunch, but when I read about some of the incredible things some religious leaders,
let alone their minions, let flow out of their mouths or their pens, I swear it makes me want to wear boxers and
then run out and make a donation to the <a href="http://www.venganza.org/" target="_blank">Churchof the Flying Spaghetti Monster</a>. Admittedly, this is a problem of mine
because I remain in the grips of greed, hatred, and delusion. But when compared
with some of the lunacy that has appeared recently in the media (and let us not
forget this is nothing new), I come off as absolutely brilliant when I say you
should make a Manhattan with rye whiskey and not bourbon.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Well, that is absolutely brilliant. But I digress.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
First event occurred last week while I was traveling in
Texas. A small time Panhandle minister purchased some space in a rural weekly
to enumerate his litany of reasons why folks should not vote for Obama, among
them being the president's alleged support for the dreaded "gay
agenda."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Seriously, if you have a copy of this, would you mind
sending it to me? Because the bitches in the Gay HQ have been ignoring my missives
as if I were Phyllis Schlafly.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
A few weeks after this atavistic nonsense is published, a
gay couple's home in that town was spray painted with the delightful words,
"<a href="http://www.connectamarillo.com/news/story.aspx?id=808278#.UHNU2E1X0ix" target="_blank">leave or die fags</a>."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
In and of itself, such an incident would not normally
send me off, even when reading about politicians that <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/08/charlie-fuqua-arkansas-candidate-death-penalty-rebellious-children_n_1948490.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000009" target="_blank">espouse the death penalty for rebellious children</a> and evolution deniers who sit on
the <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/07/bill-nye-paul-broun-science-space-technology_n_1947125.html" target="_blank">congressional science advisory committee</a>. But then I read something about an archbishop
up in Minnesota that hit just a little too close to home.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Catholic Archbishop for the Twin Cities John Nienstedt has
been on a tirade amping up the anti-gay rhetoric with his efforts to promote a
state constitutional amendment in Minnesota to ban same-sex marriage, but it
was his advice to a young mother with a gay son that stabbed me in the heart.
The archbishop told this woman <a href="http://www.truthwinsout.org/news/2012/10/30351/" target="_blank">her "eternal salvation" was at stake</a> if she did not toe the line on the church's
anti-gay position and do something about her wicked child.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I've worked really hard to remove a particular memory
from my mind, to disallow its ability to shape me, and for the most part I've
been successful. But when I read about this archbishop, it recalled for me a
day when I was in first grade at a Catholic school and the nun teaching the
class called me up to her desk. I couldn't look at her as she spoke her vile
words, and instead stared at her finger as she pounded it into the top of her
desk enunciating her words: "Richard Harrold, you are an evil and wicked
little boy, and God has forsaken you."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
OK, so I was a victim of a hate crime at 6 years old.
Whatever. It was 1964. Nonetheless, the experience left me an angry little boy
who grew up to be an angry teenager who chased whatever mind altering
substance he could find, and for many years, left me an angry and bitter man.
And let me tell you, this was one set of Samsonite I wanted to drop the fuck
off on some corner and set on fire. But would I let go of it? No, I had years
of <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.01.than.html" target="_blank">being an ox dragging my cart of woes</a> before I finally did. And when I did, I took
lots of Polaroids that I keep in my pocket to remind me of my bitterness
whenever I feel really happy.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Unsurprisingly, it is at times like these that I retreat
into the Buddha's teachings on anger to remind me of the need to develop a
compassionate mind. There's no shortage of examples within the Tipitika that <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/piyatissa/bl068.html" target="_blank">extol the virtues of letting anger go</a>. But letting go is only part of the deal.
We must also develop compassion, because without compassion, that seed of anger
remains within us to be sparked to life at a moment's notice.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The story that puts it all in perspective for me is <i><a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/vin/mv/mv.08.26.01-08.than.html" target="_blank">Kucchivikara-vatthu: The Monk with Dysentery</a></i>. In this tale, the Buddha finds a monk
suffering with dysentery who is being neglected by the other monks. When the
Buddha asks why, the reply he gets from the other monks is this monk
"doesn't do anything for the monks."</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Now, an unskilled reader might view the Buddha's reaction
to this information, as he flies into a flurry of activity cleaning and caring
for the sick monk, as the Buddha becoming royally pissed at the other monks for
being lazy and selfish sumbitches. But remember, the Buddha was an enlightened
being; he wasn't angry, he was just throwing some shade. He nursed the sick
monk back to health, then admonished the others for their failure to tend to
the sick among them. But to be useful to others, one must know what to do, just
as a skilled nurse knows how to tend to others.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
As good as it might feel in the moment, getting angry is
useless. It serves no purpose. And it certainly does nothing to remove the
hatred that may prompt it. Anger and hatred are diseases, not just emotions.
And there are people dying from these illnesses all over the place.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So when you're angry, may I suggest that you first nurse
yourself into good health before you attempt to assist others? You cannot treat
anger with more anger. You must first develop compassion. And even if you take
a long-ass time developing that compassion and never get around to ministering
to others, at least feel comfortable knowing by doing so you're creating one
less angry person in this world filled with greed, hatred, and delusion.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-35521564487086555892012-10-07T15:30:00.000-07:002012-10-10T06:12:46.437-07:00Not by hating hatred<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyQB5XRHVX-iS_ZdUU-A3y8BHuwzI_0YfxQ7pbVbrgbdU49TmfCbgof5TyeYmrGtgL-ChWGyjM_dfCHvyWWHHZgU8ouGDFJpQ1Dcx477uC7l_AVFDVLrJagfsrAD1VyO6AtyYpSbQGRMU/s1600/Matthew_Shepard.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyQB5XRHVX-iS_ZdUU-A3y8BHuwzI_0YfxQ7pbVbrgbdU49TmfCbgof5TyeYmrGtgL-ChWGyjM_dfCHvyWWHHZgU8ouGDFJpQ1Dcx477uC7l_AVFDVLrJagfsrAD1VyO6AtyYpSbQGRMU/s320/Matthew_Shepard.jpg" width="224" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Fourteen years ago on Oct. 11, I was working a Sunday
evening at The Morning Sun, a daily newspaper in Mount Pleasant, Mich. I was
watching some posts on a thing called USENET. Remember that? I was following
posts by a fellow who was updating a young man's condition out in Wyoming. This
young man was severely beaten, tied to a fence and left there in the cold night
on the Wyoming prairie.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
His name was Matthew Shepard.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I don't know why, but as I was reading these posts, I
felt like something momentous was happening. And as more details of this
horrific crime became public, it was clear a fundamental change was about to
occur within the American psyche.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Matthew was lured away by two men, Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson, who
promised to take him home. Instead, they drove Matthew into the middle of the
prairie where they pistol whipped him and tortured him. They tied him to a
fence where he remained unconscious until about 18 hours later when a cyclist
passing by spotted him. Initially, the cyclist thought Shepard was a scarecrow.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
McKinney and Henderson met Shepard on Oct. 6, 1998, and
it was probably after midnight when they beat him into a coma on Oct. 7.
Shepard remained in a coma until he died four days later on Oct. 12.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
He was 21.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
When all the details of this event became public, the anger
and hatred rising inside left me confused and feeling helpless. I hadn't found
Buddhism at that time and I struggled to find ways to make sense of such a
senseless act. I recall speaking at a candlelight vigil on the Central Michigan
University campus; nothing formal, just a hastily organized gathering where I
could not remain silent. I don't remember what I said, but I do remember how my
voice trembled as I spoke.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Today, however, I do have Buddhism, and I am reminded of
the many passages that clearly teach how anger and hatred never achieves
anything good.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"As a log from
a pyre, burnt at both ends and fouled in the middle, serves neither for
firewood in the village nor for timber in the forest, so is such a wrathful
man." Anguttara Nikaya II, 95<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And in the Dhammapada the Buddha teaches:</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"He abused me,
he beat me, he defeated me, he robbed me of my property. Whosoever harbor such
thoughts will never be able to still their enmity.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"Never indeed
is hatred stilled by hatred; it will only be stilled by non-hatred — this is an
eternal law."<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And also:</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>"Guard your mind against an outburst of wrong
feelings. Keep your mind controlled. Renouncing evil thoughts, develop purity
of mind."</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But one of the most interesting Buddhist tales about
anger is one about the Anger Eating Demon, which <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/piyatissa/bl068.html">I
reprint in its entirety from Access To Insight</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Once there lived a
demon who had a peculiar diet: he fed on the anger of others. And as his
feeding ground was the human world, there was no lack of food for him. He found
it quite easy to provoke a family quarrel, or national and racial hatred. Even
to stir up a war was not very difficult for him. And whenever he succeeded in
causing a war, he could properly gorge himself without much further effort;
because once a war starts, hate multiplies by its own momentum and affects even
normally friendly people. So the demon's food supply became so rich that he
sometimes had to restrain himself from over-eating, being content with nibbling
just a small piece of resentment found close-by.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>But as it often
happens with successful people, he became rather overbearing and one day when
feeling bored he thought: "Shouldn't I try it with the gods?" On
reflection he chose the Heaven of the Thirty-three Deities, ruled by Sakka,
Lord of Gods. He knew that only a few of these gods had entirely eliminated the
fetters of ill-will and aversion, though they were far above petty and selfish
quarrels. So by magic power he transferred himself to that heavenly realm and
was lucky enough to come at a time when Sakka the Divine King was absent. There
was none in the large audience hall and without much ado the demon seated
himself on Sakka's empty throne, waiting quietly for things to happen, which he
hoped would bring him a good feed. Soon some of the gods came to the hall and
first they could hardly believe their own divine eyes when they saw that ugly demon
sitting on the throne, squat and grinning. Having recovered from their shock,
they started to shout and lament: "Oh you ugly demon, how can you dare to
sit on the throne of our Lord? What utter cheekiness! What a crime! you should
be thrown headlong into the hell and straight into a boiling cauldron! You
should be quartered alive! Begone! Begone!"<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>But while the gods
were growing more and more angry, the demon was quite pleased because from
moment to moment he grew in size, in strength and in power. The anger he
absorbed into his system started to ooze from his body as a smoky red-glowing
mist. This evil aura kept the gods at a distance and their radiance was dimmed.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>Suddenly a bright
glow appeared at the other end of the hall and it grew into a dazzling light
from which Sakka emerged, the King of Gods. He who had firmly entered the
undeflectible Stream that leads Nibbana-wards, was unshaken by what he saw. The
smoke-screen created by the gods' anger parted when he slowly and politely
approached the usurper of his throne. "Welcome, friend! Please remain
seated. I can take another chair. May I offer you the drink of hospitality? Our
Amrita is not bad this year. Or do you prefer a stronger brew, the vedic
Soma?"<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>While Sakka spoke
these friendly words, the demon rapidly shrank to a diminutive size and finally
disappeared, trailing behind a whiff of malodorous smoke which likewise soon
dissolved.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<i>— Based on Samyutta
Nikaya, Sakka Samyutta, No. 22</i></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Hmm, it just occurred to me, did the demon disappear in a
fart?</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-1488672145963062342012-09-20T12:15:00.000-07:002012-09-20T12:15:55.566-07:00Guilty of simply being<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJken9I14JSEdUyDWnQr8BDVc-noHn8wnPCnwJaqc6AIt_khpK1pFl4D4Zd4_6OlqJCGrZ9f5Y4EbRUuDIi2d4U1TBcIDYf8gKL0UUqqh3WvV1MS5QK8dNOKv1tNqrGui_HIDK3LY0Muk/s1600/John+Partridge+Harrold+unknown+date.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJken9I14JSEdUyDWnQr8BDVc-noHn8wnPCnwJaqc6AIt_khpK1pFl4D4Zd4_6OlqJCGrZ9f5Y4EbRUuDIi2d4U1TBcIDYf8gKL0UUqqh3WvV1MS5QK8dNOKv1tNqrGui_HIDK3LY0Muk/s320/John+Partridge+Harrold+unknown+date.jpg" width="248" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Amelia is a blogger at Huffington Post and under this
pseudonym she has been writing about her 7-year-old son. The kicker here is
that her son self-identifies as gay.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
"Huh? What? That's nuts! How can a 7-year-old
self-identify as gay? He hasn't even hit puberty!"</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
o_O</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I know. It's really amazing some of the things people
say. Because I find it completely plausible that Amelia's son identifies as gay
despite his age. I knew I was gay when I was 4 years old. I just didn't have a
word for it. Being gay is not about sex. Our being gay is about who we are as a
human being, it's a fundamental trait about ourselves that we intuitively know.
We don't need anyone to tell us who we are, we just know.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The words come later. I knew I was a boy even before
people labeled me as "boy." And when people started using that word,
I began to use it. But I was a boy before I learned that word. Learning the
word did not make me a boy.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And I did not become gay once I knew the word. I knew
already who I was. Had I known what "gay" meant when I was 4 years
old, I would have readily accepted it as a label for who I am, just as Amelia's
son accepts the word. By the time, however, I did learn about words like
"gay" and "homosexual," I was also learning about words
like "fag" and "sissy." So even though I intuitively knew
those words were about me, I did not "identify" as such. Rather, I
became a ghost.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
But enough of that. I want to get to <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/Amelia/conversations-i-dont-want-to-have-with-my-son_b_1884723.html?ref=topbar" target="_blank">Amelia's most recent post</a> in which she talks about the
conversations she knows she'll have to have with her son even though she dreads
the moment when they will occur. Nothing very surprising here, these are the
conversations we all know about. That yes, there are people who hate us even
though they never met us. That we can't give blood, even to a family member.
That we cannot marry the person we love. We might not be able to visit that
person in the hospital too, and when they die, we might not have any say about
what happens to them.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
That's not what caught my eye in Amelia's post, however.
It was this line:</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
"My child is guilty of nothing but simply being."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
This is such a beautiful statement and its sentiment is
at the heart of why Buddhism has been a lifesaver for me. Because unlike other
religious doctrines, at least in my experience, Buddhism allowed me to simply
be. It showed me how to be a human "being" rather than a human
"doing." And it showed me how to escape the pain I was fettering
myself with.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Life is unsatisfactory and events seldom go the way I
want them to.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
The angst I feel day to day about this is self-created
because it's my choices that have brought me to where I am right now.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
If I can learn to make better choices and become less
attached to things and feelings that are merely temporary, I will be happier.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
By following the Buddha's path I will free myself of this
self-induced drudgery by accepting things as they really are and understand
better how my actions now influence what happens next.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So simple, but as Amelia and the world show us every day,
not so easy to implement. Dealing with the world around us is no easy task. And
for children who identify as gay, it can be brutal. That's because the world is
ruled by delusion. Most people are either incapable or simply refuse to see
things as they really are. But once you start doing that in even the smallest
ways, the transformation is incredible. And what is more astounding is as we
begin to see things as they really are, something begins to bubble up from deep
inside us, something that was always there, but was blocked and smothered by
our deluded egos.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Compassion. And once we have compassion, it doesn't
matter what the world throws at us. We become unflappable.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
If you haven't read Amelia's blog on Huffington Post, you
should. It's a delight.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-13927354367328947212012-09-16T09:42:00.000-07:002012-09-16T09:42:10.736-07:00You dress so gay<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRggW1IxkH0wVejaAin56YT16aX6nb5bWwnqrAEQAFSJXClPkESyavqjE1PVjMiz9MvY083-DPJi580t-hYOGLAQyWz9pX_n0p_cUOSKEAQo8hcHgTCy6Ac6YLce64hA9awpXuozqo-D8/s1600/548835_10151206968727656_2088680708_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRggW1IxkH0wVejaAin56YT16aX6nb5bWwnqrAEQAFSJXClPkESyavqjE1PVjMiz9MvY083-DPJi580t-hYOGLAQyWz9pX_n0p_cUOSKEAQo8hcHgTCy6Ac6YLce64hA9awpXuozqo-D8/s320/548835_10151206968727656_2088680708_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Parents in Malaysia! Beware! If your son likes to wear
V-neck shirts, it's because he's gay and wants to show off his body to other
boys!</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And your daughters, if they prefer the company of only
some girls, but not all girls, look out - they're lesbian!</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Seriously? o_O</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Yes, the Malaysian government is at it again. It's all
over <a href="http://globalvoicesonline.org/2012/09/16/malaysia-parenting-guidelines-on-how-to-spot-gays-and-lesbians/">the
news in Asia</a>, but also getting attention with some <a href="http://gawker.com/5943307/malaysian-education-ministry-releases-hysterically-stereotypical-guidelines-for-parents-looking-to-detect-homosexual-symptoms-in-their-children">Western
press and bloggers</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I wrote about efforts in Malaysia to revive reparative
therapy techniques <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2011/07/making-chai-tae-out-of-kathoey-or-real.html">to
turn ladyboys into real men</a>, so I won't recover all of that. But it seems
the Malaysian government is really paranoid about having gays within the
populace and is soliciting the help of parents and teachers in spotting this
scourge so something can be done about it.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
As I've said before, it would all be laughable if it
weren't so freaking real. The seminars being hosted in Penang, which has been
known to have a lively gay scene, are the fourth conducted in the country.
Despite that lively scene in Penang, a friend of mine who lives there is
absolutely scared to death to have anyone find out he is gay.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Buddhism is about refuge and I have found the Buddha's
teachings to be excellent support for gay practitioners. Yes, there are
Buddhist commentators and teachers who adopt homophobia as part of their
doctrine, but that's their doctrine, not the Buddha's. <a href="http://mybuddhaispink.blogspot.com/2009/07/coming-out-and-buddhism.html">When
I launched this blog</a> a little more than three years ago, I wrote about how
our coming out process was a liberating experience very much like the
liberating feeling we experience when we encounter the Dhamma.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I hope our family in Malaysia remains strong throughout
this, regardless of their religious point of view. Some meditative sessions on
loving kindness are probably in order.
And the more musclely straight men who wear colorful V-necks and carry big
satchels, the better.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-47799525206051517152012-09-15T08:14:00.000-07:002012-09-15T08:14:02.989-07:00Bid adieu to your ennui<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHXdwZfX2GzkKjjz_J-DvfNs2dn7NCBOCei9YMR4SUuHhfB8Q-XdacJZZO06aguxM7Jh-rco9Y8CdGFppCJQp_BXGXzcA-ytvWKDsLA9jnWwKuvUYfFqY3U1VfvCKLFo6d0yJB9PQDTiw/s1600/Modern+Wing4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHXdwZfX2GzkKjjz_J-DvfNs2dn7NCBOCei9YMR4SUuHhfB8Q-XdacJZZO06aguxM7Jh-rco9Y8CdGFppCJQp_BXGXzcA-ytvWKDsLA9jnWwKuvUYfFqY3U1VfvCKLFo6d0yJB9PQDTiw/s320/Modern+Wing4.jpg" width="240" /></a>It has been months since I posted something, and even
before that last post, my contributions to this blog have been sporadic. And to
some extent, uninspired. There was something creeping into my life. It's called
ennui.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I knew it was there, but last night as I walked through
Boys Town feeling morose and unwanted (I was totally channeling Linda
Ronstadt), I overheard a couple gay boys at least half my age chatting behind
me: "We're celebrating our six-year anniversary," said one.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Bitch.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Then I read a message from someone I've been texting with
and whom I was planning to meet in a couple weeks: "I hope you aren't
expecting anything more than conversation when we meet."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Double bitch.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And this all leads me to recall a conversation I had earlier
in the evening. I was dining at a vegan restaurant in Old Town with a colleague
from work. She and I had a wonderful time: the food was excellent, I brought a
fabulous wine to share, and our conversation was bright and happy and
thrilling. Being the social media fanatics she and I are, we both checked in on
FourSquare and we got a special - free desert.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
When dinner was over and we examined the desert menu, I suggested
the blueberry cheesecake because I thought the blueberries would go well with
the remaining wine. My mind was totally in the realm of cheesecake and all that
word means to me. So when the cheesecake was delivered to our table, its
appearance immediately struck me as odd. And when I tasted it, the texture was
not at all what I expected.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I was disappointed. I said as much, noting that it was
good, but it was not what I expected at all. My friend gently reminded me that
we were dining in a vegan restaurant, so traditional cheesecake would not be
served. I said to her, "You know, it's funny how it is most often our
expectations about something that create our disappointment, not the thing
itself. This cheesecake is really quite fine, but because I had expected
something creamy and smooth and decidedly not vegan, I was unhappy."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Yes, our expectations. Not the thing itself. This is so
basic Four Noble Truths kind of stuff that I feel like I should cancel my
subscription to the Dhamma and quickly find a bed of nails to lie on. It's just
as my friend Curt recently said: "We've got to get you out of this rut
you're in, Richard."</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And that word "rut" was so apropos. I had been
in both a mental and sexual rut, honing in on deliciously young men whom I was
successfully converting into a series of trysts. It was making me feel adequate
because look at me! I'm a 54-year-old man and see this cute 20-something with
me? But the trouble has been most 20-somethings aren't ready to settle down
into anything long-term; they want to play just as much as I do. And the ones
that say they do want something long term, well, have you ever tried having a
conversation with someone who is less than half your age? I often can't even
find any musical interests that we share in common.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So there it is - ennui staring me in the face. And it's
because I've been spending a lot of time on the outside of me. I've been
kicking my ass in a good way at the gym, losing weight and toning up. I've
started attending a yoga class that has really helped my flexibility and my
overall sense of health. And while I have been chanting and meditating, it's
not as regular as I feel it should be. And frankly, I haven't read any Dhamma
since ...</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
My friend Curt is right. I need to find a way out of this
rut of endlessly pursuing younger men with whom I have nothing in common other
than an overactive libido. Because that day will come when I no longer got it
going on. Maybe it's because of my stroke earlier in the year. You'd never know
just by looking at me that I had one. But there may be a thought nugget inside
my mind that is telling me to live it up as much as I can because I may not be
so lucky with the next one. It's as though I'm Jack Nicholson in "Five
Easy Pieces" when he attempts to reconcile his relationship with his
father who's been incapacitated by a devastating stroke.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
So there it is. There it is, really, for all of us.
Because in some manner, we are all creating our own disappointment with
everything, our own dissatisfaction, and we're doing it via our expectations.</div>
Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-50404098218124154632012-04-18T15:06:00.001-07:002012-04-18T15:07:10.902-07:00When will it end?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1kcxsy9AI_yerabawtMRyXapPAaKLwWLqiwvPACTsoR9UsmCh47xXwPfWbDMkI-74ez_yf3eLHtIMeXKJHnlmpndGG3tHwGZg9Z8sBHF_mFvqXGH_5OJvy1MHuRGG7K-ZPhSJcKl0j9g/s1600/6a00d8341c730253ef0168ea40195b970c-800wi.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="176" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1kcxsy9AI_yerabawtMRyXapPAaKLwWLqiwvPACTsoR9UsmCh47xXwPfWbDMkI-74ez_yf3eLHtIMeXKJHnlmpndGG3tHwGZg9Z8sBHF_mFvqXGH_5OJvy1MHuRGG7K-ZPhSJcKl0j9g/s320/6a00d8341c730253ef0168ea40195b970c-800wi.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Bob Dylan had a million great lines within the lyrics to his songs and unfortunately, one of those lines is all too perfect for the moment.<br />
<br />
<i>“And how many deaths will it take till we know that too many people have died?”</i><br />
<br />
That comes from “Blowing in the Wind,” and it came to mind when I learned yesterday that, again, another gay teen took his life.<br />
<br />
Kenneth Weishuhn was a 14-year-old from northwest Iowa who dreamed of being married one day to another boy.<br />
<br />
It seems that about two weeks ago, Kenneth, who was very well-liked at his school, decided to come out to his friends. They must not have been very good friends because after telling them he was gay, Kenneth became their target of ridicule and hurt.<br />
<br />
Kenneth lasted one week and then <a href="http://www.towleroad.com/2012/04/weisuhn.html#more" target="_blank">he killed himself</a>.<br />
<br />
Once the news spread, complete strangers have been flocking to <a href="http://pinterest.com/15kweishuhn/when-i-get-married/" target="_blank">Kenneth’s Pinterest page</a> to leave heart-felt words.<br />
<br />
The list is getting too damn long. And that’s just the list of those who make the news. The <a href="http://www.itgetsbetter.org/" target="_blank">It Gets Better Project</a> is a great response to help these teens wrestling with hatred and despair – there’s even a new one produced by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Ym0jXg-hKCI" target="_blank">gay Mormon students who attend BYU</a> – but I can’t help but notice the irony that at least two videos in the project were made by teens who later killed themselves. That has to be a huge weight on these teens. And I thought I was carrying an unbearable burden when I was a teen. Or maybe I just found a way to carry it.<br />
<br />
Buddhism tells us we are the owner of our feelings, but that’s really difficult to understand and accept when the bad feeling you have is connected directly to others who relentlessly and gleefully taunt you, then hunt you down to taunt you some more. What can make it easier is having others around you that can support you, even protect you. And yet, Kenneth thought he had friends like that. That’s why he came out to them.<br />
<br />
I’m kind of rambling right now.<br />
<br />
How many deaths does it take? I bet at least one more.Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-21077209468435474492012-03-29T13:45:00.001-07:002012-03-29T20:22:26.185-07:00Debating a monk is dukkha<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVfFvd8-Yo9EmdepEIX4J1zvm0IZWVxcmydzt7P4nQe2U7ORW01DT8oFAEnr51WD66NY_LXh8ugQeYLwGDgAv1B5Zdq41t-rIZe_ljqcTdD3B8_At-Q08zp4Z78w4X1eEt1SLWUfNLdC0/s1600/boy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVfFvd8-Yo9EmdepEIX4J1zvm0IZWVxcmydzt7P4nQe2U7ORW01DT8oFAEnr51WD66NY_LXh8ugQeYLwGDgAv1B5Zdq41t-rIZe_ljqcTdD3B8_At-Q08zp4Z78w4X1eEt1SLWUfNLdC0/s320/boy.jpg" width="212" /></a></div>Have you ever tried to point out to a monk that he just might be full of shit? It’s not an easy thing to do, because let me tell you, some monks are very adept at turning the tables and making you out to be the problem, that it’s your delusion operating here, not theirs.<br />
<br />
I stumbled into such a debate after seeing a post on the <a href="http://www.facebook.com/groups/202187709824318/" target="_blank">Heartland Singapore Facebook page</a>. It was referring to a <a href="http://buddhavacana.net/2010/10/17/can-a-gay-person-be-ordained-as-a-monknun/" target="_blank">post at buddhavacana.net</a>, which appears to be a message board. There are other, blog-like pages on this site, but it doesn’t appear to be very active. Anyway, you can read my heresy by following the link I provided.<br />
<br />
The gist of this began with a question emailed to the monk administering the page: “Can a gay person be ordained as a monk/nun?”<br />
<br />
Bhante Shi Chuanguan replied with this: “Heterosexual men and women have to transcend their heterosexual desires if they are going to be ordained. Similarly, gay person can be ordained as a monk/nun, as long as this person can transcend this inclination.”<br />
<br />
Me thinks I detect a double standard here.<br />
<br />
As an aside, the Venerable Ashin Sopaka had a very pithy comment on the Heartland Facebook page, to which I will return later. But my response on the forum was to say I thought the answer provided, as well as an answer provided by another presumed monastic, was drawing a distinction between straight people seeking ordination and gays seeking ordination, that each was to be treated differently.<br />
<br />
The Bhante said that straights had to “transcend their heterosexual desires,” while a gay person had to “transcend this inclination.”<br />
<br />
This inclination? So the straight person need only renounce his or her sexual desires, while the gay has to renounce being gay? In other words, renounce his or her sexuality. What’s up with that?<br />
<br />
You can read my entire reply on the message board, as I waxed very eloquent and pontificated like a true queen in heat. Perhaps that was a bit rash, because Bhante replied and suggested that, “Your inference that there is such a prejudicial idea is what is prejudicial.”<br />
<br />
Moi? OK, OK, you can read my reply to that bit of obfuscation, because clearly this Bhante wanted to paint me the ignorant dualistic thinking bitter fag and a poor victim of all that nasty hate in the world, which, I would point out, often begins with narrow-minded and atavistic interpretations of religious doctrine by Paleolithic thinkers such as him. But I digress.<br />
<br />
What I want to do is now return to Ashin Sopaka’s comment on the Heartland Facebook page. Ashin Sopaka succinctly points out that apparently the requirement to enter the monastery and seek ordination is to already be an enlightened being. Doesn’t the requirement that a gay first “transcend this inclination” mean that one must have renounced all notion of self, which can only be achieved upon enlightenment?<br />
<br />
Seems to me that all the monastic code requires is that the monk or nun abstains from any form of sexual activity. That living in a monastery is the venue through which a monk or nun practices the doctrine to eventually transcend all fabricated notions of identity, whether they are sexual or otherwise. What “inclinations” remain in the unenlightened mind is irrelevant to anyone else in the monastery, as it is the duty of the monk or nun to peel back the layers of delusion and clinging within his or her own mind to ultimately attain freedom.<br />
<br />
I’m sure Bhante Shi Chuanguan is a very wise man and knows his Dhamma pretty well. But his understanding of gay people, in my opinion, is no better than your average homophobe.<br />
<br />
<b>Update:</b> I am pleased to say that Shi Chuanguan replied to my comments in a manner suggesting that we are coming together to a closer understanding.Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-37336378568246054132012-03-23T10:23:00.002-07:002012-03-24T06:55:35.159-07:00It’s not always about me<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuAJU_ybpEi-tK1boCbvtmf0HHIjAa_TLc-Eh1TKYtT0pxTDrbZVOChyphenhyphenh9fAQMC7D12-z2NNzWG_uFPqnYu0oFiL8lTrgj1WeAa5nblz57u-E6wgfYibCX-bJ_swFah_PPUTRTd11laVE/s1600/Jimmy+Huang's+pic8.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuAJU_ybpEi-tK1boCbvtmf0HHIjAa_TLc-Eh1TKYtT0pxTDrbZVOChyphenhyphenh9fAQMC7D12-z2NNzWG_uFPqnYu0oFiL8lTrgj1WeAa5nblz57u-E6wgfYibCX-bJ_swFah_PPUTRTd11laVE/s320/Jimmy+Huang's+pic8.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Next time something you would label as “bad” happens to you, take a look around. You’re in that situation for a reason. And that reason might be an opportunity to be helpful to someone else.<br />
<br />
When I was hospitalized following my stroke, I was placed in a room with another man who was really sick. Not that I wasn’t really sick – people are usually not admitted to a hospital unless they are really sick – but my roommate was pretty miserable.<br />
<br />
His name was Tom, and I guess he was probably in his 30s. Shortly after I arrived in the room, he received some visitors. I quickly discerned that Tom’s visitors were his fellow residents from a group home for developmentally disabled adults. Over the next 24 hours I also picked up that Tom had a severe lung infection. He had a tube in his chest to drain fluid, but each time a nurse came in to check him, he or she would comment that there wasn’t much drainage.<br />
<br />
Tom and I gradually got to know each other. I explained to him my situation and he explained his. Tom wasn’t stupid, but it was evident to me why he lived in a group home.<br />
<br />
Eventually, the doctors began talking about getting Tom into surgery because not only was the fluid not draining from his lungs, it was solidifying. Tom was miserable, in pain, and frightened by the idea of surgery. “I don’t want to die,” he said.<br />
<br />
The surgeon did a fantastic job of explaining to Tom why he was recommending surgery, doing so using imagery that Tom could understand. The liquid in his lungs at first was like liquid Jello, but like Jello, it was beginning to solidify into a wriggly mess in the lining of his lungs. If nothing was done, that Jello-like stuff in his lungs would eventually become like Jello left out in the air – it becomes hard and stiff. What the surgeon wanted to do was open a small hole in Tom, stick something into his lungs and scrape this gunk out of his lungs.<br />
<br />
As all doctors must say, the surgeon said there were risks involved. But with someone like Tom, enumerating these risks, while legally required, just frightened him more. His sister, whom I also got to know, did her best to explain to her brother that while these risks were real, the surgery could make him feel better.<br />
<br />
Tom was lost in a thicket of views. He didn’t know what to do. He would agree to the surgery, but it was evident he was simply agreeing with what the adults around him were suggesting. So he was saying what they wanted to hear. It was clear, however, that Tom was scared shitless.<br />
<br />
After he and his sister talked some more about the surgery, she got up to go to the cafeteria. When she was gone, Tom said, “Richard, what do you think I should do?”<br />
<br />
Me: “Tom, do you like the way you feel right now?”<br />
<br />
Tom: “No.”<br />
<br />
Me: “You’re in a lot of pain right now, aren’t you?”<br />
<br />
Tom: “Yes, and it’s not getting better.”<br />
<br />
Me. “Right, it’s not getting better. And I know you are in pain, because having a chest tube stuck inside of you like you have is one of the most painful things to go through. And I must say you have been really strong dealing with that, you know that?”<br />
<br />
Tom: “Yes. But I don’t want to be like this.”<br />
<br />
Me: “Well, if you don’t have the surgery done, what will happen?"<br />
<br />
Tom: “I won’t get better.”<br />
<br />
Me: “That’s right, you won’t. And what did the surgeon say if nothing was done?”<br />
<br />
Tom: “The stuff in my lungs will get hard and I will get worse.”<br />
<br />
Me: “Yes, that stuff will get hard and you will get worse. And what else did he say?”<br />
<br />
Tom: “I will die.”<br />
<br />
Me: “So you know that, you know you do not like how you feel right now, and you know if you don’t do anything about it, it will get worse and you will die. But if you have the surgery, what can happen?”<br />
<br />
Tom: “I can get better.”<br />
<br />
Me: “You will get better."<br />
<br />
Tom: “But I could die in the surgery.”<br />
<br />
Me: “Yes you could. But that’s a maybe. You know you will die if you do nothing. You know you won’t get better if you do nothing, right? So let me ask you this. Are you willing to go through some more pain for a short time after the surgery, but knowing the pain will go away and you will feel better?”<br />
<br />
Tom thought about it for about 10 seconds and then said, “I’m going to do the surgery.”<br />
<br />
The day Tom was wheeled into surgery was also the day I was sent home. I gave his sister one of my email addresses to let me know how things turned out. A couple days later I got her missive explaining that the surgery went well and that Tom was rapidly recovering. She thanked me for being a calming presence for Tom and helping him sort through this frightening experience.<br />
<br />
Did karma put me in that room? I can’t say. But I can say this. I was there and I had a choice. I could either dwell in my own world of woes – and I might even have had a legitimate reason to do that – or I could recognize an opportunity to alleviate someone else’s suffering.<br />
<br />
We face these choices every day. They may not be as grand as my situation, but we face them nonetheless. All it took was a small step outside of my inner world and be aware that it’s not always about me.<br />
<br />
Photo courtesy of my friend Jimmy Huang.Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-61980905482248266032012-03-13T18:13:00.000-07:002012-03-13T18:13:46.414-07:00A new meaning of mindfulness<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0TvZEmL8datXmU33_0pRmIY_45upvrWVQJOF8ux-foowK4v93fOKXTqL_ditV2fOFdVrKUrnQMV3ATnRAb3xulH0Ijc_L9_8noaBZI4k_ERW5CyZYZ3UPJESdp_wH6EYL-eZZNWA7uPY/s1600/stroke+002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0TvZEmL8datXmU33_0pRmIY_45upvrWVQJOF8ux-foowK4v93fOKXTqL_ditV2fOFdVrKUrnQMV3ATnRAb3xulH0Ijc_L9_8noaBZI4k_ERW5CyZYZ3UPJESdp_wH6EYL-eZZNWA7uPY/s320/stroke+002.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>There’s nothing like having a stroke to change the way you think about mindfulness. Sure, I had a conception of what it meant, what being mindful was all about. And in that notion was a root connected to raw awareness. But it seems I've been looking beyond that raw awareness and seeking something else that I thought was mindfulness.<br />
<br />
That is, until I had a stroke.<br />
<br />
It was a minor stroke, one cause by a clot in the vision center of my brain. It’s affected my peripheral vision on my left side in both eyes. Everything else – motor skills, speech, cognitive abilities, taste, smell – remain unaffected. To give you an idea, when I’m sitting in the passenger seat of a car, I can see just fine straight ahead. And I have normal peripheral vision to the right. But my vision ends at the center console. I can’t see the driver at all unless I turn my head.<br />
<br />
Needless to say, I bump into doorways on the left side frequently because I can’t see the left side of the door jam. People or other moving objects coming up from behind me and passing on the left startle me because I don’t see them until they’ve already past and are almost in front of me. And unless I look directly at what I am reaching for, I may misjudge and fail to grasp it if it’s on my left.<br />
<br />
There is a possibility that my field of vision may return to normal. Since my stroke, which was this past Friday, the blind spot has shrunk a bit. But it’s still there. It’s still significant.<br />
<br />
In the meantime, I am learning some rather harsh and immediate lessons about mindfulness. And it’s changing the way I think about mindfulness. It’s not this overall gestalt that I used to think it as; rather it’s very specific. Mindfulness doesn’t just mean being aware of the world around me any longer. It means being aware of what I am doing right now in this world around me, and that means just a small part of this world around me, not this big expansive world that I had been thinking about.<br />
<br />
My moment of realization was when I was being discharged from the hospital. I was elated I was finally getting out. I’d spent four days there waiting for tests to be completed. As I was gathering my belongings, I reached to my left for a Styrofoam cup of ice water I knew was there. But instead of grasping the cup, I closed my hand too soon, puncturing my thumb through the side of the Styrofoam and spilling water onto the table.<br />
<br />
It was then I realized what being mindful really meant, what was really required of me. And it also made me aware of how I had taken for granted my awareness and my ‘mindfulness.’ No longer could I be casual about even the simplest thing like reaching for a cup of water. No longer could I be automatic while doing something as simple as walking through a doorway. When dining out, I must be extra sensitive to a server coming in from my left, or a glass or utensil on my left. And when I cross the street from now on, my life depends on my mindfulness more than it ever has before.<br />
<br />
I’m actually finding all this quite thrilling. Believe me, if given a choice I would not want to reach such understanding by having a stroke. But I did have one. That can’t be changed. And now I’m ready for a new day.Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2998998547000813414.post-63603894110455771102012-03-07T07:40:00.001-08:002012-03-07T07:55:20.331-08:00Capture Kony in 2012Not necessarily a Buddhist topic per se, but watch the video and do what you can. No matter how small your effort, whatever you do will help. Sometimes the video doesn't show up, just click the reload link if you see it below and the video should appear.<br />
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<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="225" mozallowfullscreen="" src="http://player.vimeo.com/video/37119711?title=0&byline=0&portrait=0&color=d13030" webkitallowfullscreen="" width="400"></iframe><br />
<a href="http://vimeo.com/37119711">KONY 2012</a> from <a href="http://vimeo.com/invisible">INVISIBLE CHILDREN</a> on <a href="http://vimeo.com/">Vimeo</a>.Richard Harroldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02943119066949899198noreply@blogger.com0