How Sigala avoided a honey of a boo boo

Buddhism, in part, is about asking questions to determine how things really are. But to truly see the truth, you have to ask the right questions. And the question on my mind at the moment is whether Honey Boo Boo is foreshadowing the decline of civilization.

Homo say what? Honey Boo Boo?

A friend and former colleague examined this question in a recent column he wrote for The Morning Sun, a newspaper in Mount Pleasant, Mich., and one I worked for in the past. Please take the time to read it, as it is excellent. And don't feign ignorance with me; I know all you moes out there know about Honey Boo Boo, because she is exactly the archetype and stereotype of breeder culture that we love to throw so much shade over that it becomes a black hole. And I bet many of you watched this train wreck of humanity more than once.

Come to the light, children, there is still hope for you.

While I may sound a bit holier-than-though when I say this, it is true: I have not, nor will I, watch Honey Boo Boo. I did watch an online trailer for the show prior to its indecorous debut and that was enough. I wanted to cleanse my eyes with Comet after that. I saw enough, however, to know instantly that civilization was perched upon a perilous precipice, over which it could tumble into oblivion at any moment.

My friend clearly points out in his column that we, in a collective sense, have only ourselves to blame for this type of programming dreck. He writes:

"You can blame the network all you want, but the people who run the network have a very simple mission: Make money. They do that by reducing costs and maximizing viewers. Quality costs money and doesn’t bring the right number of viewers to make it the most profitable way to do business. So, we get Honey Boo Boo.”

And to add insult to injury, the folks in TV land have created elaborate methods to convince you that the programming available is, in fact, high quality backed by tons of creative minds. It's done through the annual awards show that lavishes praise on the most popular programs with idols of pseudo-excellence, which is why programs like "Glee" churn out episode after episode creating new nadirs for every conceivable sexual, racial, and ethnic stereotype out there and cleverly confuses you into thinking that it's really a ground-breaking and inclusive show portraying gays and others in a positive, albeit humorous, light.

It's all a diversion designed to lull you into a false sense of happiness so that you will more readily accept the commercial content that batters your psyche with often better production quality than the programs it sponsors. Its intent is to stupify you in a manner Bob Dylan eloquently described in his song, "It's Alright Ma (I'm Only Bleeding)".

Advertising signs they con

You into thinking you’re the one

That can do what’s never been done

That can win what’s never been won

Meantime life outside goes on

All around you

This is precisely why the Buddha advised a young fellow named Sigala to avoid theatrical shows.

o_O

Patience my pretties. I think that a reason why many practitioners do not read Dhamma is quite similar why other folk do not read the Bible or whatever holy book guides their religion, and this is the language in these texts is archaic and not easily understood. For that reason, it can be easily viewed as irrelevant to today's culture.

For example, in the Sigalovada Sutta, the Buddha includes "watching theatrical shows" as an item in a list of activities that lead to the loss of wealth. And then he enumerates the reasons why and how watching theatrical shows result in this:

"There are, young householder, these six evil consequences in frequenting theatrical shows. He is ever thinking:

(i) where is there dancing?

(ii) where is there singing?

(iii) where is there music?

(iv) where is there recitation?

(v) where is there playing with cymbals?

(vi) where is there pot-blowing?

Pot-blowing? What the hell is that? And what's wrong with singing and dancing?

This is what I'm talking about. People look at this and think that Buddhism has no relevance for them. The problem, however, is not that Buddhism lacks relevance; the problem is the question - we aren't asking the right questions.

No, there is nothing wrong with singing, or dancing, or even pot-blowing, provided we don't get too carried away. Remember that the Buddha described his path as the middle way. He tried the extremes and found them lacking. The path to spiritual bliss is neither followed by extreme pleasure or by extreme deprivation. And while we follow the way in the middle, we must be honest in evaluating our emotions.

Remember what the First Noble Truth is? For many people, life is more than just unsatisfactory, it can really suck, and too many of us queer folk know this all too well. But for most people life is how Henry David Thoreau described it when he said, “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.”

Believe it or not, shows like Honey Boo Boo are tapping into a collective sense of dismay and dissatisfaction that permeates our lives. It presents an opportunity, albeit a false one, for us to watch someone else's life self-destruct and gives us a sense that things can't be all that bad, "thank god I'm not in Honey Boo Boo's family!"

But like the theatrical shows the Buddha warned Sigala about, this is a distraction that keeps us in our self-dug hole of dissatisfaction. Shows like Honey Boo Boo aren't designed to uplift us, to inspire us; they're designed to keep us in a rut of meaningless existence, to set us up for the next string of commercials that will entice us to spend money on goods and services we don't need and which, if we took just a few seconds to think about it, we don't want.

There are a lot of unhappy people in the world. We can't help them all. But are you at least trying to help a few of them?

I know that I am not. And that needs to change.

Just be a mensch

As I continue to research the Tipitika and the writings of other significant Buddhists on the issue of racism and bigotry – a trending topic from time to time in the Buddho-blogosphere – I thought I would take a bit of a diversion and address a question Terasi posed here.

The gist of Terasi’s question is what does Buddhism offer in terms of practical daily applications? I’ve heard from others about how Buddhism strikes them as being very esoteric, with lots of talk about how to attain Nibbana. But if a person is struggling with their job, or without a job, can Buddhism help with that? Can Buddhism help someone who needs to develop the motivation to stick with an exercise regimen? Can Buddhism help you get out of debt? Can Buddhism get you a salary raise or a promotion at work?

The answer to these and similar questions is yes, but Buddhism won’t get you these things in a direct way. Rather, developing a skilled Buddhist practice that focuses on your personal development into a decent human being will create an easier world around you through which you can maneuver. The problems you face in the world will diminish (but not disappear) as you develop a skilled Buddhist practice because you won’t be creating so many of them anymore. And when that happens, you are better able to help and assist others.

But that’s all high-brow holiness, you’re thinking. I just want to get a better paying job so I can find a better place to live for my family and have our needs met, you say.

Actually, it’s not high-brow at all. It’s very practical. Let’s start in the Digha Nikaya with the Sigalovada Sutta: The Layperson’s Code of Discipline (DN 31). This portrays an encounter between the Buddha and a young man named Sigala, the son of what we would probably call a very middle class father. The Buddha instructs Sigala on proper behavior that will not only protect his reputation, but preserve and expand his family’s wealth and status.

There are four vices that Sigala must eradicate from his behavior and character: killing, stealing, lying and adultery (sexual misconduct). As the Buddha tells Sigala, “These four evils the wise never praise.” By avoiding these vices, others who may be able to benefit you take notice and are willing to assist. But if you exhibit any of these vices, then those who may be able to assist you will withhold their aid when you need it.

Next, the Buddha tells Sigala that he must be sure that his actions are not being led by desire, anger, ignorance and fear (Right View and Right Intention). If our motivation for acting is rooted by desire, anger, ignorance or fear, we will do something that we may later regret; we will bring harm to ourselves, to others, or perhaps both ourselves and others.

This is followed by the Buddha’s description of the six ways we lose our money and good reputation: heavy partying, hanging out late at night, frequenting nightclubs and discos, gambling, associating with companions who are no good, and being lazy.

My favorite part of the sutta is when the Buddha describes to Sigala the four types of people who act like your friends, but who are really enemies, followed by the traits of true “warm-hearted” friends. The former will ruin you and lead you to make wrong decisions, while the latter will protect you and encourage you to make good decisions. There’s even some advice on money management.

The wise and virtuous shine like a blazing fire.
He who acquires his wealth in harmless ways
like to a bee that honey gathers,
riches mount up for him
like ant hill's rapid growth.

With wealth acquired this way,
a layman fit for household life,
in portions four divides his wealth:
thus will he friendship win.

One portion for his wants he uses,
two portions on his business spends,
the fourth for times of need he keeps.

In the last section the Buddha describes the qualities of good parenting, followed by the qualities of being a good son or daughter.

While the Sigalovada Sutta is overtly directed at lay followers, all the suttas – even the ones that are focused on the Jhanas – contain information and guidance that have practical application in our daily life. A good one on this point is the Bhaddekaratta Sutta: An Auspicious Day (MN 131).

In this sutta from the Majjhima Nikaya, the Buddha delivers the most basic guidance of the Buddhist practice: Do not dwell on the past, do not live in the future, pay attention to what is happening right now. The past is over, but what you did in the past is why you are where you are right now. Worrying about the future will not improve your future, nor deliver you to a more desirable future. Rather, by paying attention to what you are thinking, saying and doing right now so that you act skillfully will bring you good results and deliver you to a future filled with happiness.

So while Buddhism doesn’t provide a direct route to achieve material and worldly goals, by following the path faithfully and earnestly, we experience good results more frequently and negative results less frequently. And when opportunity knocks, we find ourselves more aware of the opportunity and better prepared to take advantage of it.

Article Swap Part 3

It's time again for the Article Swap Part 3, brainchild of Nate DeMontigny at the blog Precious Metal. Writing for my blog today is Emily Breder, author of the blog Peace Ground Zero. My post for the swap is appearing at Tanya McGinnity's blog Full Contact Enlightenment.

Sometimes we encounter passages in the canon that don't immediately fit into how we know the world today. Emily takes such a passage from the Digha Nikaya and shows us that even in some of the most arcane passages, the Buddha's lessons and guidance continue to have relevance today. Thank you Emily for this wonderful post! Read on!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

It started before we were in grade school and the first one was released. The boys began to disappear from the playgrounds and bicycles, changed somehow into shadows of their former selves. When the hormones became intense, they would flee their darkened lairs and pursue the teenaged girls (or boys) that existed outside, only to retreat back to their dungeons once the novelty of a new relationship had worn off. Nothing was more fascinating than their flickering worlds contained in those little electronic boxes, offering all the adventure and excitement that was stifled in suburbia.

The gaming culture was born.

It was just a phase, right? Once adulthood came along, bringing with it adult responsibilities and cares, the childish escapism that home gaming systems offered would lose their appeal. Little did we know how tempting the next game would be; new stories, weapons, graphics and voice-overs to draw them in again and again. So willingly they march to the local store for midnight releases, sometimes in full costume (!!!) of their favorite character, even when well into their thirties.

Escapism… thoughtlessness… excessive leisure… all in the name of being occupied and entertained, without a goal or purpose in sight. Moreover, the very nature of the activity provides a temporary distraction to the pointlessness that they themselves present, feeding back into itself. Just finish this level, then the next game, then maybe get the better version, and then I’ll be satisfied. Just one more try… meanwhile, the cat’s in the cradle and the precious moments of life are passing by unnoticed. Some of these games are even marketed as time-wasters.

The Sigalovada Sutta refers to the ‘unwholesome dissipation of wealth’. It may seem strange to discuss ‘dissipating wealth’ when we live in such economically trying times, but this has more to do with behaviors that promote happiness in yourself and others than money itself.

"What are the six channels for dissipating wealth which he does not pursue?

(a) "indulgence in intoxicants which cause infatuation and heedlessness; (b) sauntering in streets at unseemly hours; (c) frequenting theatrical shows; (d) indulgence in gambling which causes heedlessness; (e) association with evil companions; (f) the habit of idleness.

From the Sigalovada Sutta: Layperson’s Code of Discipline (DN 31)

Gaming culture would fit into the ‘frequenting theatrical shows’ section, which is further described as the constant participation in these activities, and waiting and searching for the next event and discussing past and future participation. Every moment of the day is enthusiastically consumed by these activities or the obsessive thinking about them. Sports mania, cosplay (sorry) and other frenzies are also a symptom of not being in touch with real life- they are completely conceptual, entities of the mind. We build and subtract in our minds around these ideas endlessly.

The brain consumes so much energy when involved in these tight loops of thought that there is little left over for productive activity and the illusory sense of not being active can even make them feel that any time not playing should be spent working- leaving no actual rest time (meaning time without obsessive thinking or work). Humans need rest; rest from playing as well as working. Online communication can’t replace being face-to-face, and sitting on your butt all day playing games does not count as restful activity.

While we can’t give meaning to others, the best way to help is to set a good example and offer alternatives to our loved ones. Game if you like, but life exists outside of the virtual world, and time doesn’t stop for anyone.

In every moment, we have a choice. We may live in a way that we don’t prefer, and due to things that we can’t change, but that doesn’t mean we have to care for our lives and homes in a way that is consistent with the lowest possible standard- even a closet-sized place in the city can be an oasis if we put our actions where our minds ought to be. Likewise, in regards to our care for our self and mind can take ultimate priority, only it doesn’t have to be bound by the strictures of money- only of time.

The replacement of the time lost in endlessly completing programmed storylines with pointed training of the mind seems like a win-win. It’s actually far more interesting, too. Most people don’t realize what a deep well each and every mind is, like a living painting. Even people you may consider hopelessly shallow and materialistic have the potential to wake up to their real potential as human beings. All it takes is a choice, each and every minute, to embody the qualities of the best person they can imagine and never letting the attention sway from the mindful awareness of each passing moment. It takes practice, lots of it.

Here we are in this life and with limited time, but our situation in being human is an extremely fortunate one. Don’t be afraid to use it. Immersing yourself in another world is a way to avoid this one, and the moments are rushing by faster than it seems.

Panditavagga: The Wise

After covering fools in the Balavagga, it makes sense that the Buddha would next bring up the wise, which he does with the Panditavagga, a word that is almost as fun to say as Balavagga. What I find nice in this chapter of the Dhammapada is how I am able to recognize within these verses facets of the Buddha’s teaching in other suttas, particularly the verses pertaining to friends and friendship.

The first pair of verses, while talking about a sage or teacher, can easily be applied to how one ought to select his or her friends.

“Regard him as one who
points out
treasure,
the wise one who
seeing your faults
rebukes you.
Stay with this sort of sage.
For the one who stays
with a sage of this sort,
things get better,
not worse.

Let him admonish, instruct,
deflect you
away from poor manners.
To the good, he’s endearing;
to the bad, he’s not.”

And the next verse is more explicit.

“Don’t associate with bad friends.
Don’t associate with the low.
Associate with admirable friends.
Associate with the best.”

What these verses call to mind for me is the Sigalovada Sutta (DN 31), also known as the Layperson’s Code of Discipline. In this sutta, the Buddha guides a young householder on how to identify the four types of harmful friends – “foes in the guise of friends” – and the four types of good friends – “warm-hearted friends.” The company we keep is critical to the level of skillfulness we are able to attain, and if you feel that something is holding back your progress, take a look first at the people you associate with; your hindrance just might be another person.

A sense of stoic resolve is also described in the Panditavagga as being a characteristic of the wise: the wise are like a deep and calm lake; like a rock that won’t budge in the wind. But this steadfastness is not apathy, or even descriptive of someone who doesn’t know how to have fun. Rather, it is a quality of consistency, of having a lack of caprice.

“Everywhere, truly,
those of integrity
stand apart.
They, the good,
don’t chatter in hopes
of favor or gains.
When touched
now by pleasure,
now pain,
the wise give no sign
of high
or low.”

So what this tells me is that it’s not that the wise don’t experience pain or pleasure – they do. It’s just when these experiences occur, the wise aren’t like a chatty Cathy, running around telling everyone about it and drumming up the intensity like a drama queen. It’s not always an easy thing to do, retaining that sense of equanimity in the face of any extreme. We are, after all, human beings filled with the capacity of experiencing emotion. And things happen that can overwhelm us. Of course, at the root of this are all our attachments.

“There he should wish for delight,
discarding sensuality —
he who has nothing.
He should cleanse himself — wise —
of what defiles the mind.

Whose minds are well-developed
in the factors of self-awakening,
who delight in non-clinging,
relinquishing grasping —
resplendent,
their effluents ended:
they, in the world,
are Unbound.”

In our mundane lives, this “relinquishing grasping” is no small feat. I am by no means a fool, but I am far from wise. It wasn’t easy for me to say goodbye to Benny at O’Hare, knowing he was leaving and not coming back. Attachments can be a positive in our life, provided that what we hook ourselves up to enhances our skillfulness, supports our happiness and leaves us a better person. But we must remember that even this will pass because all phenomena – people, places, things, events – are impermanent.

It does help a little bit when I recite each time after I meditate: “All that is mine, beloved and pleasing will change and vanish.” It helps prepare me for the eventual, but this thing called samsara can be a real bitch at times.